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    #16
    Is this all from the same care center? Has she been at any other place? If so,, same issues? Is she marked as the trouble kid and not getting the proper attention from the staff? Turn over ever stone and try to get her the help she needs. May need to see some professionals.

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      #17
      3 yrs old is tough - good luck to you!

      There has to be something that draws a response, keep looking and finding out what that is.

      Spanking doesn’t always work. Spanking harder will just make you feel worse. Especially when you don’t get the response you were looking for.

      I was a bad kid that got whooped multiple times a week until I was ten or eleven. Spankings never made me act any better.

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        #18
        It sounds like y’all are already on the right track. Both of our kids have been fairly easy with minor exceptions here and there. IMO the biggest thing is to make sure that both parents align and are consistent. Then, find whatever leverage will have the most impact and use that. Some kids it might be spanking, others taking devices away or combination.

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          #19
          Start with digital devices as mentioned above. Look into ODD. Look into Love and Logic.

          Every kid is different. Spanking isn't a cure all and while it might work on some kids, there are better/more effective methods of discipline IMO.

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            #20
            My son had many of the same problems it seemed.

            You would spank him till you passed out and he didn’t care. He behavior at school was not stellar at all. We ended up taking him to the doctor and he has been diagnosed with ADHD. He is on a low dosage medication now and it has changed everything for the better.


            Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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              #21
              I have spanked my son to the point of being ashamed, it did not one bit of good. He has a great heart but was easily the worst kid in the class, everyone said he will grow out of it, complete bull crap. By 4 we took him to the Menninger Clinic, crazy expensive but we were at the end of the line, within one hour the head of Baylor Pschy said our son was severe ADHD+, this was devastating for us and me especially since I teach Special Education. This ADHD+ diagnosis means that his mental issues could and very possibly will morph into something else ie: Bipolar or something along that lines, but it can also mean that he will adjust and grow out of it, ie: learn how to control it. Our Dr described it like a sports car going down the road at 100 mph and throwing the steering wheel out the window, that's my sons brain, all we have done with medicine is give him the wheel back to help control his impulses and slow down and think. It has taken me a long time to understand this, it is still difficult because when off his medication he is absolutely wild, on his medication he is still wild but it is wild like a normal child. His medicine is so strong that the Dr said if I was to take it that I would sleep All day and likely have to be hospitalized. My son weights 60 pounds and I weigh 205, the fact that medicine has helped so much is a God sent, I spanked my son way to much, everyday as a matter of fact and he would cry, he would apologizes and say I can not help it, the sad thing is that he honestly could not help it. I feel terrible about spanking him back then, my daughter is younger and when I spank her the results are what you would expect, she stops the action that caused the spanking.
              I am not saying your daughter has what my son does, but it is my experience with my son who scored off the charts IQ wise but was also the biggest problem in his grade.
              God Bless

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                #22
                Originally posted by Mayhem View Post
                My son had many of the same problems it seemed.

                You would spank him till you passed out and he didn’t care. He behavior at school was not stellar at all. We ended up taking him to the doctor and he has been diagnosed with ADHD. He is on a low dosage medication now and it has changed everything for the better.


                Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
                Riley was like this as well. Spankings worked to an extent but taking away her ability to ride her horses was the trigger that worked

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                  #23
                  At 3 it may be difficult to tell, but spankings for my youngest just got interpreted (by him) as hate and anger towards him. We only spanked for disobedience and seldom was their anger on our part. Come to find out, he has Asperger's, which is a form of autism. These kids see things differently and sometimes responses are inappropriate.

                  I say there are some behavioral issues but it may not be just simple rebellion.

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                    #24
                    Make sure you are both calm and cool before discipline. Explain why she is being disciplined and what you expect to change. After that, time-out for specific issues and no tv or devices if the behaviour continues.

                    My daughter was doing some of the same things around that age. My wife had no problem with spankings but I just could not do it. We used a combination of these things to varying degrees of success. Ultimately, she just grew out of it. She is now 16 and ended up better behaved than her brother, who was an angel at three.

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                      #25
                      1. Routine is key
                      2. They reflect what they see as in shows, parents etc.
                      3. Lots of love and attention
                      4. minimize certain cartoons and electronic devices to a minimum.
                      5. Reward and love them

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                        #26
                        What kind of tasks do y'all make her do at home? Does she comply?

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                          #27
                          When my son was 3-4, he was pretty disobedient. We cut out screens (TV, he didn't have access to an ipad or phone or video games) and his attitude changed tremendously. What's crazy is now, even at 7, if he watches tv for too long, his attitude afterwards tends to be pretty bad.

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                            #28
                            When spanking doesn’t work...

                            Get a willow switch, it’s speaks a different language. Always spoke to me better that a hand or belt!


                            Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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                              #29
                              Had the same issue with my middle child (son). He got booted from two daycares during his 3’s and 4’s. Spanking him would just make him mad and he would hold a grudge and “get even with us” with his behavior at school.
                              What we learned as the best punishment was boredom, sending him to timeout, make him sit in the corner, etc. we would also take away his toys and favorite books.
                              Don’t know if it actually impacted him or if he just grew out of it but can say he is having a great year in kindergarten and has kept himself out of trouble. Also, the teacher has told us that he is way advanced for his age and has put in a request for gifted and talented program.

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                                #30
                                I, being a kid who got a belt when I was bad (and self-corrected, lol), know it can work with some kids who are just doing bone-headed things. As I've grown, however, I don't believe spankings of any kind are a good idea until the child can fully discuss, understand, and reason through why their hide got tanned. Three years old is way too young for that. A late elementary/ early middle schooler can take a belt to the point of not being able to sit and reason through why it's not a good idea to do that again.

                                I taught 5th grade for 5 years and saw every conceivable behavior disorder and those experiences led me to realize that there is almost always an underlying issue driving the behavior and it's not a "paddle and they'll stop".

                                Instead, seek some professional guidance and look for the underlying issue(s). Austim? Aspergers? ODD? ADHD? When I discussed these with parents, many would go and seek counseling and more often than not we'd get a major improvement with how we interacted with the child and/or how the child was treated at home.

                                I do know that I had a handful of really difficult children and their parents would do the same as you... Come to school and paddle them. It never worked for the ones in my classroom or in my teaching partner's classroom. Even the two parents who gave the kids a complete beat down didn't fix their behavior. Those two parents ended up with CPS issues because the "discipline" was so severe...

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