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Old 07-09-2019, 04:15 PM   #201
Smart
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Have a brother in law, who I hunted with a few times too many. He would go a week with Little Debbie, water and cheese crackers. We would be eating steak, chops, chicken, and sides at meals. He would sit by us like a dog waiting for scraps to fall. Once in a while he would get what was left, not often. He also always forgot his wallet and money. That lasted only a couple times.


That is just freaking pathetic......I used to fish with one of those guys... used to..
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Old 07-09-2019, 04:31 PM   #202
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Smart, and he owned two steak house restaurants! Sorry to say the least! Both closed, wonder why!
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Old 07-09-2019, 04:42 PM   #203
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I am a pretty good cook and love cooking at camp! If you need a camp cook, I’m game as long as I get to do a little hunting too


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Old 07-10-2019, 07:46 PM   #204
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I guided a fellow on some exotic hunts and he begged me for a spot on my Mexico lease. He owned a café in Pearland and said he would bring all the food. Okay, bring enough for 4 or 5 days if we need to stay that long. I took along a loaf of bread and some Spam, just in case.
He follows me to the lease and we start to unpack. I say, where the food? In that bag, got a bunch of eggs and some steaks. Nothing else? Nope. Guy weighs over 300 lbs and chain smokes, coughs constantly one of those deep bellowing coughs.
It's late so I say, you take it easy, I'll fix dinner. I open the bag and there are 6 dozen eggs, DUCK EGGS! Welllll, okay, we'll make them work. Got a fire going and I'm looking for the steaks. His steaks were a 3 year old(minimum) box of hamburger patties, COMPLETELY freezer burned through and through. Starting to panic at this time.
I'll fry up a bunch of eggs and make some toast and try cooking the patties. The first egg I break is fine, second egg is green mush, completely rotten and stinking to high heaven. Throw out both eggs, clean the pan and start over. Same thing happens two more times, I give up. He said he has his boy go around his lake and pick up eggs from all the duck nest. He thought they would be fine.
Grilled the freezer burned patties on a mesquite fire. Don't let anyone BS you, there are some things that not even a mesquite coal can render edible. I eat part of my Spam and bread and go to bed.
Guy snores like a freight train and has sleep apnea. Two in the morning I give up and go sleep in my truck.
To be continued.....
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Old 07-10-2019, 11:51 PM   #205
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... waiting


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Old 07-11-2019, 08:12 AM   #206
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Wanting more


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Old 07-11-2019, 08:14 AM   #207
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I guided a fellow on some exotic hunts and he begged me for a spot on my Mexico lease. He owned a café in Pearland and said he would bring all the food. Okay, bring enough for 4 or 5 days if we need to stay that long. I took along a loaf of bread and some Spam, just in case.
He follows me to the lease and we start to unpack. I say, where the food? In that bag, got a bunch of eggs and some steaks. Nothing else? Nope. Guy weighs over 300 lbs and chain smokes, coughs constantly one of those deep bellowing coughs.
It's late so I say, you take it easy, I'll fix dinner. I open the bag and there are 6 dozen eggs, DUCK EGGS! Welllll, okay, we'll make them work. Got a fire going and I'm looking for the steaks. His steaks were a 3 year old(minimum) box of hamburger patties, COMPLETELY freezer burned through and through. Starting to panic at this time.
I'll fry up a bunch of eggs and make some toast and try cooking the patties. The first egg I break is fine, second egg is green mush, completely rotten and stinking to high heaven. Throw out both eggs, clean the pan and start over. Same thing happens two more times, I give up. He said he has his boy go around his lake and pick up eggs from all the duck nest. He thought they would be fine.
Grilled the freezer burned patties on a mesquite fire. Don't let anyone BS you, there are some things that not even a mesquite coal can render edible. I eat part of my Spam and bread and go to bed.
Guy snores like a freight train and has sleep apnea. Two in the morning I give up and go sleep in my truck.
To be continued.....
You should have cooked them eggs and patties and served them to him- green mush and all. And ate your spam yourself.
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Old 07-11-2019, 08:36 AM   #208
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Originally Posted by White Falcon View Post
Have a brother in law, who I hunted with a few times too many. He would go a week with Little Debbie, water and cheese crackers. We would be eating steak, chops, chicken, and sides at meals. He would sit by us like a dog waiting for scraps to fall. Once in a while he would get what was left, not often. He also always forgot his wallet and money. That lasted only a couple times. Now he hunts by him self!
He is the kind of person who will fall in a bucket of sh*t and come out smelling like a rose.
The do you mind filling my feeder guy, or can you pick me up some deer corn guy. Lol

Always looking to ride together to the lease, but can’t take his truck due to _______ reason. Lol
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Old 07-11-2019, 08:48 AM   #209
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hot fire torts jap cheese opas links and mustard what more do you need
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Old 07-11-2019, 09:00 AM   #210
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hot fire torts jap cheese opas links and mustard what more do you need


Figured you just ate everyone else’s. J/k




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Old 07-11-2019, 09:16 AM   #211
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So definitely no spam , bacon, ham ,pork sausage, shrimp or lobster
He is the "I will go to Costco and get sides" guy. Usually gets away with spending <$10.
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Old 07-11-2019, 09:27 AM   #212
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Figured you just ate everyone else’s. J/k




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didnt say it was mines
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Old 07-11-2019, 09:30 AM   #213
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Default "Mooie-A-Hass"

Day hunt in South Texas 25 years ago...
Landowner provided dinner he called "Mooie-A-Hass"...a grilled fatty cut of meat that looked like a purple tumor. Took one bite to be polite and headed to town for dinner. I later was told by a local some call it sweetbread...yuck
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Old 07-11-2019, 09:38 AM   #214
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Day hunt in South Texas 25 years ago...
Landowner provided dinner he called "Mooie-A-Hass"...a grilled fatty cut of meat that looked like a purple tumor. Took one bite to be polite and headed to town for dinner. I later was told by a local some call it sweetbread...yuck
Think sweetbread is the fat around the stomach. Cooked right, it's actually pretty good in tacos.
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Old 07-11-2019, 09:44 AM   #215
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Think sweetbread is the fat around the stomach. Cooked right, it's actually pretty good in tacos.
The fat around the stomach is called caulfat. Sweet bread is actually a gland from the pancreas and is very good fried or in a gravy.
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Old 07-11-2019, 09:45 AM   #216
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hot fire torts jap cheese opas links and mustard what more do you need
... a comma or two?

Agreed that mollejas (or "Mooie-A-Hass" LOL) are good if cooked properly. I like them chopped up real small and crisped on the flattop. Some pico/cheese?! fuhget about it!

Man! Talk about some horror stories. I had similar problem, to a lesser degree, a few times. Instead, I have started doing all the food shopping for EVERYBODY and they Venmo me their portion of the cost BEFORE heading out to my place. It's a little different though as all of the guests are friends of mine rather than acquaintances i've met at the lease.

Once, my uncle brought balls (that's the culinary term ) from the previous weekend's castration party. Mom about fainted when he split the first open.

Last edited by BlackHogDown; 07-11-2019 at 10:11 AM.
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Old 07-11-2019, 10:06 AM   #217
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First time I had "Mooie-A-Hass" I thought they were chicken fajitas. **** good stuff- until I found out what I was eating...
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Old 07-11-2019, 11:11 AM   #218
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They are good!!
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The fat around the stomach is called caulfat. Sweet bread is actually a gland from the pancreas and is very good fried or in a gravy.
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Old 07-11-2019, 11:54 AM   #219
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Originally Posted by BlackHogDown View Post
... a comma or two?

Agreed that mollejas (or "Mooie-A-Hass" LOL) are good if cooked properly. I like them chopped up real small and crisped on the flattop. Some pico/cheese?! fuhget about it!

Man! Talk about some horror stories. I had similar problem, to a lesser degree, a few times. Instead, I have started doing all the food shopping for EVERYBODY and they Venmo me their portion of the cost BEFORE heading out to my place. It's a little different though as all of the guests are friends of mine rather than acquaintances i've met at the lease.

Once, my uncle brought balls (that's the culinary term ) from the previous weekend's castration party. Mom about fainted when he split the first open.
we talkin food here aint got time for no commas why we pausin when we talking food lol
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Old 07-11-2019, 01:49 PM   #220
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If I may continue..... somewhat off the food subject.
I had previously told the client to not take any other rifles or pistols in Mexico other than his registered rifle. I noticed that he failed to remove his .22 derringer belt buckle once we in Mexico. Uh oh!!
Okay, so the first morning I headed out to the head of a large ravine. The client took off in an open top jeep smoking his head off and continuing his bellowing coughs. I watched a beautiful black horned 10 point that just wasn't what I was looking for. I got back to camp and reported what I had seen. The client turned into a whinny kid complaining about no deer, bad place, etc. He whined the entire time we were in camp while I had another spam sandwich. Up to this point, I had not seen him consume a single bite of food, only cigarettes and black coffee.
I got tired of his whining and finally told him where the black horned deer was. I knew there was no way he would kill the deer with his chain smoking and bellowing cough. I seemed to forget this guy was luckier than a three di**ed dog! He had previously killed 39"+ axis with me a couple of years earlier. Well, he killed the deer after only sitting 10 minutes at 40 yards. The deer must have thought the cough was another sick buck and came to investigate.
Back at camp that night I had another spam sandwich. The client ate nothing except cigarettes and black coffee. Did I mention he weighed about 300 lbs?
I went to bed early to try and beat him to sleep. Hard to force yourself to sleep even though I was dog tired from no sleep the night before. Around midnight I was a physical and mental wreck listening to his snoring. Sleep apnea is so inconsistent that there is no rhythm to the snoring. He finally made one long drag of breath and was silent.....for a longggg time. I remember thinking, "Well the SOB is dead, good, I'll get some sleep and deal with the body in the morning". About that time he drew in another big drag of breath. Dang, back in my truck for the second night of sleeping or trying to.
To be continued.....the best is yet to come!!!
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Old 07-11-2019, 01:56 PM   #221
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Sleep apnea is so inconsistent that there is no rhythm to the snoring. He finally made one long drag of breath and was silent.....for a longggg time. I remember thinking, "Well the SOB is dead, good, I'll get some sleep and deal with the body in the morning".
Had this same feeling with my cousin once. We were in a tent to climb Guadalupe Peak the next morning and I couldn't sleep a wink. He wouldn't breathe for what seemed like 30 seconds then he'd attack the atmosphere. Bad thing is he sells sleep apnea gear.
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Old 07-11-2019, 01:59 PM   #222
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Had this same feeling with my cousin once. We were in a tent to climb Guadalupe Peak the next morning and I couldn't sleep a wink. He wouldn't breathe for what seemed like 30 seconds then he'd attack the atmosphere. Bad thing is he sells sleep apnea gear.
That's the #1 rule... "Dont get high on your own supply"
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Old 07-11-2019, 02:15 PM   #223
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the lease/camp I go to its my buddies dads place, so when he's there its like thanksgiving everyday, I probably hike a total 20 miles during the trip due to the terrain and tactics we take to get to our spots and I believe I still gain 10 pounds during the week lol
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Old 07-11-2019, 04:36 PM   #224
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Strawberry pie.....it was horrible.
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Old 07-11-2019, 04:50 PM   #225
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Strawberry pie.....it was horrible.
Somebody did something wrong
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Old 07-12-2019, 05:26 AM   #226
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In for more of Hombre's story, dang what a mess
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Old 07-12-2019, 05:31 AM   #227
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Strawberry pie.....it was horrible.
I missed that weekend.

Just for the record Byron always brings great food to camp so if you want a guest to feed you right, he is definitely the man.

Gary
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Old 07-12-2019, 08:06 AM   #228
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An old bud of mine brought 3 small packs of Fritos to deer camp one time for 4-5 of us.
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Old 07-12-2019, 08:24 AM   #229
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One of my friends on my lease said he was going to bring breakfast and for the most part everything was fine......... But he brought some bacon from a pig his ag class raised that they had butchered and it was absolutely horrible. I thought I would never say that I didnt like bacon but that day I did. I find it hard to even describe, I guess the only way to put it is that it was SUPER gamey tasting.
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Old 07-12-2019, 10:09 AM   #230
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I have never tried spam...


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I love me some Spam. Fried crispy, its hard to beat.
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I haven't had spam in years but we dang sure ate it when I was a kid. Fried spam or fried bologna sandwich with fried taters and onions with pork n beans. Good stuff.
Love me some fried spam I just came across a recipe the other day for homemade spam...I'm gonna give it a try when I get the time to make it

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OP, sounds like you brought your skinny friend to deer hunt. Get you a fat friend. We know how to cook and eat
For the most part...but I have a few friends who resemble me that go by the thought "quality doesn't matter, it's the quantity that matters" no, quality most definitely matters

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That's the #1 rule... "Dont get high on your own supply"
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Old 07-12-2019, 12:03 PM   #231
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The finale....
Next morning I crawl out of my truck and go to the kitchen for a Mayo sandwich and a coke, Spam is long gone. My man is smoking a cigarette and drinking black coffee. Hasn't eaten anything since we got there. I told him I was going hunting and we would try to get some food from the cowboys for lunch.
I came in around noon and the guy was gone, lock stock and barrel. The cowboy said he had cone to the casa in Tejas. I was beat, mentally, physically and **** hungry for something other than spam and mayo.
I loaded up my stuff and headed to Giddings, about 6 hour drive, got home around 9 that night. Next morning another lease hunter called and said, have your heard from Bill? Nope, he left sometime yesterday morning. Well, he never showed up and his wife called looking for him. UH, OH. (Remember the derringer belt buckle)?
Following day, Bill shows up in Pearland. Apparently, when he got to the American side, he got surly with Customs, they asked him to step out and officer sees the belt buckle. Not illegal but suspicious. He continues to get surly and officer runs his rifle through the system. Rifle was stolen in Houston couple years before. (Bill said he bought if from a guy down on his luck)
Bill gets to spend next two night in Laredo compliments of Webb County sheriffs department and loses his rifle and some change.
I did manage to get his cape and horns out for him but that's another story. I guess the moral of this story is when you say you're going to bring food to the lease, don't bring rotten duck eggs.
Been a while since I've had a Spam sandwich.
Adios
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Old 07-12-2019, 12:17 PM   #232
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^^^ great story!
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Old 07-12-2019, 02:38 PM   #233
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Bologna sandwiches taste so much better at the lease.
100% fact
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Old 07-12-2019, 03:52 PM   #234
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In reality, I love me some good quality baloney and cheese sammiches with fresh white bread, mayo, lettuce, maters n pickles washed down with an ice cold glass of milk... Of course I also like ribeyes too!
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Old 07-12-2019, 04:15 PM   #235
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In reality, I love me some good quality baloney and cheese sammiches with fresh white bread, mayo, lettuce, maters n pickles washed down with an ice cold glass of milk... Of course I also like ribeyes too!

I had a thick sliced Bologna sammich first night at the lease! I love a fried bologna sammich as well. That said we were cleaning axis till late and didn't feel like cooking! Next two night we had grilled axis tenderloin and backstrap though!


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Old 07-12-2019, 04:47 PM   #236
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I had a thick sliced Bologna sammich first night at the lease! I love a fried bologna sammich as well. That said we were cleaning axis till late and didn't feel like cooking! Next two night we had grilled axis tenderloin and backstrap though!


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Yea, well that'll work too!! Love me some spotted megafawn steak too!! Course, them what knows me pretty much know's I like to eat!!
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Old 07-12-2019, 05:31 PM   #237
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bolgna, mayo, and spam suck
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Old 07-12-2019, 06:00 PM   #238
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Originally Posted by GigEmAgs07 View Post
We have a "jew" at our lease. I will just leave it at that.
This is patently anti-semitic. I love this site and appreciate and enjoy most of the people on it. Consequently, there should be zero tolerance for bigoted, ignorant comments like this so that we can keep it a great site that is welcoming to all.
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Old 07-12-2019, 06:15 PM   #239
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This is patently anti-semitic. I love this site and appreciate and enjoy most of the people on it. Consequently, there should be zero tolerance for bigoted, ignorant comments like this so that we can keep it a great site that is welcoming to all.
I understand your sentiment but I think you are taking this way too far IMO. His comment was in quotations. People take things was too serious. Call me a redneck, white trash, etc........doesn't bother me one bit. Stereotypes will not go away in our lifetime. Stereotypes are also WAY different than bigotry. He was merely implying that the guy was a cheap*****
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Old 07-12-2019, 06:55 PM   #240
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Dang I want to come to deer camp just to eat with some of y’all. Forget Hunting!
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Old 07-12-2019, 07:28 PM   #241
Russ81
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What’s the point of killing these animals if not to eat good in camp?!?!?



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Old 07-12-2019, 07:31 PM   #242
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What’s the point of killing these animals if not to eat good in camp?!?!?



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yessir
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Old 07-12-2019, 07:52 PM   #243
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What’s the point of killing these animals if not to eat good in camp?!?!?



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Amen to that! I've never seen a crappie in the woods and I'm not that mad at deer! I'm gonna eat good in the deer woods or I'm not going!!!


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