It is not the answer...

[okrattler]

Sir,
Many of our friends who have issues with mental illness attempt to self medicate with alcohol or drugs. It gives them some relief from symptoms but usually gets them deeper over their head. Solution is for us all to take the stigma off of getting treatment for mental illness. Right now men have an easier time talking about treatment for ED than mental illness.

Very true. I had a friend in high school that killed himself a few years after he graduated. I sat in a garage with him and just a few buddies a week before and drank a beer or two. He acted like everything was fine. Never once broke down crying or told us he was having problems at work and with his girlfriend. Which is what lead up to his death. Both of which are things you can fix. You can always get a new job,a new wife or girlfriend and you can make more money if you're broke. You can't if you're dead though. Wish he would have said something so we could have told him that.

[Charles]

Condolences and prayers sent my friend!

[RascalArms]

It is not the answer...

Most people harbor pains you may never know about. We obviously all don’t handle the pain the same way. Some learn how to deal with tragedy and somehow survive over time and are more capable than others.

I feel too many times that those that end it just fall into a terrible “perfect storm” of bad timing. Drugs and alcohol temporarily medicate the pain and because they are in an altered state of mind, it’s easier to make a permanent decision to a temporary problem.

It’s sad....life sucks at times and you just have to struggle through it.

Sometime the pain is harder on the survivors.

[Black Ice]

It is not the answer...

dang man!



Good on you for being there for him.



Ive seen suicide from all walks of life and age classes. Some I understand and some I just don't it.

Haven’t been able to get him on the phone since but he’s at least texting me.


Not really sure what to do. He’s getting divorced it sounds like and he’s several states away with nobody there except for his ex.


Thinking of telling him I’m booking a flight out there and asking if he will commit to picking me up at the airport.







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[jerp]

Sorry for your loss - losing someone close to you due to suicide is gut wrenching. On a positive note at least now men are becoming more likely to talk openly about depression which is the common denominator in most all of these cases. It wasn't too long ago people with depression were told to "man up and snap out of it" instead of recognizing it for the insidious disease it is. Someone committing suicide brought shame on their family and were often never spoken about again. There's been progress but there is a long way to go.

[Tryton]

Thanks to all that are aware and get involved. Just caring and conversation has saved a lot of people and changed their outlook. Unfortunately sometimes it doesn't matter. I have lost 2 friends over the last couple years. One was a total surprise and to this day I have no idea why. the other one talked about it for a year before he did it. So many people stepped up and offered help, and assistance, and love but in the end it, he did it anyway.

Prayers to all of the families effected by this.

[ACCURACYINC]

It is not the answer. I've been through it with one of my closest friends a little over 3 years ago and it was devastating to everyone who cared about him. Sometimes you just can't know the demons a person is struggling with. In hindsight, there were warning signs, but he continually told me he was fine and just going through a rough patch he was sure he'd get through. Then it happened, and he made sure I found him... with a self inflicted gunshot to the head. If I ever have a doubt in the future, there will be an intervention whether they like it or not. If you do go through it with someone you care about, you carry a burden of guilt after the fact. You have to remember that it is not your fault, and you might need some counseling of your own. I did.

[RascalArms]

It is not the answer. I've been through it with one of my closest friends a little over 3 years ago and it was devastating to everyone who cared about him. Sometimes you just can't know the demons a person is struggling with. In hindsight, there were warning signs, but he continually told me he was fine and just going through a rough patch he was sure he'd get through. Then it happened, and he made sure I found him... with a self inflicted gunshot to the head. If I ever have a doubt in the future, there will be an intervention whether they like it or not. If you do go through it with someone you care about, you carry a burden of guilt after the fact. You have to remember that it is not your fault, and you might need some counseling of your own. I did.

Great advice. Sorry for your loss and the trauma of dealing with the aftermath.

[Artos]

Thinking of telling him I’m booking a flight out there and asking if he will commit to picking me up at the airport.

brother, my gut is screaming you should do just that...

[manwitaplan]

brother, my gut is screaming you should do just that...

Same here. And sooner than later.

Sorry you are dealing with this.


Sent from my iPhone

[ACCURACYINC]

brother, my gut is screaming you should do just that...

Agreed. Without a second thought.

[ultrastealth]

Had a scare yesterday. A friend's son tweeted that he was going to end it all. I got a call from my son about it and texted the kid's father to let him know. He called me, and said that he knew about it and was trying to have him committed ASAP, as he'd stopped taking his meds and gone off the deep end. It shouldn't be as hard as it is to have someone committed.

[myway]

[QUOTE=Black Ice;14722831]My BIL sent me a text last weekend out of the blue that scared the crap out of me. I stayed on the phone with him until 3:00 am.

No offense bud but why would you share that exchange on the internet? Good on you for being there but I think embarrassment and shame are a huge part of the problem. Hopefully you received that phone call and he is in a better place mentally.
No offense intended just my .02.

[TX_Kevin]

[quote=myway;14723594]

My BIL sent me a text last weekend out of the blue that scared the crap out of me. I stayed on the phone with him until 3:00 am.



No offense bud but why would you share that exchange on the internet? Good on you for being there but I think embarrassment and shame are a huge part of the problem. Hopefully you received that phone call and he is in a better place mentally.

No offense intended just my .02.

Aren't we all family? I for one have more friends from TBH than I can count. Encourage each other. Help. That is what we do here. Internet or no.

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[LennyWayne]

My BIL sent me a text last weekend out of the blue that scared the crap out of me. I stayed on the phone with him until 3:00 am.

.....reading the text string suddenly made my screen blurry.

It looks like you added another day to someones life, brother, and that makes you a hero in my book.