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Old 05-10-2022, 07:49 AM   #1
andre3k
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Default Why pay for kids college?

I guess the obvious answer to this question is because parents want to or feel obligated to pay.

I have two kids, five and seven and right now I don't have any plans to funds their college education. Why? Because my parents didn't pay for my school and it probably the best thing they could have ever done for me.

It was the first time I had to figure it out on my own. If I wanted to graduate college I knew it was completely up to me financially and academically. I was able to pay my way through school with academic scholarships, working and taking out a few small loans. I graduated in 2002 with about 10k in student loans. That experience taught me hard work, planning, and eventually changed my views from being somewhat liberal to a conservative.

Whats everyone else's views on paying for their kids college? Are you delaying or postponing retirement to pay for your kids school?



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Old 05-10-2022, 07:54 AM   #2
Hart8
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My son went to a private school in Ovilla,because I wasn't down with the Red Oak school system..I told him I wasn't paying for college.Got his whole life to pay it back If he chooses to.
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Old 05-10-2022, 07:55 AM   #3
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I'm thinking I'll probably pay for my kids college. But my idea is to make them take out loans during college and only pay off their loans at the end if they actually finish. I don't want to be left holding the bag if they don't finish.

Who knows though, my little dude aint even born yet so I've got plenty of time to decide how I'll actually handle it.
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Old 05-10-2022, 07:57 AM   #4
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My kids have to secure loans in their name. If they progress and complete school, I'll pay off their loans. I struggled through college, working and paying my own way. I'd like for my kids to focus on their study, and not on a job, but they are aware if they squander the opportunity, they'll start their career in debt, without a skill or education.
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Old 05-10-2022, 07:58 AM   #5
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We were able to pay our kids college. We told them if they kept up good grades they were taken care of. Both graduated with honors and I was more than happy to get them started in life without debt. Both have very successful careers and would do it again . IMO, no reason not to help out if possible. YMMV.
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Old 05-10-2022, 07:58 AM   #6
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My kid got an academic and shooting scholarship to a university in Florida. It covers half of tuition. He earned that half so I'm paying for the other. My parents didn't pay for what little college I attended so I have nothing to show for it.

I didn't have plans either which was dumb. I'm making it work. He will graduate like I didnt.

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Old 05-10-2022, 08:00 AM   #7
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Funding (2) 529 accounts to give my kids a fighting chance.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:02 AM   #8
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Zero reason for any kid not to go to college for free. While I was teaching HS I had a student who went to the counselors office everyday. Asked them for scholarship information. He filled out every single one of them. He then got online. Did the exact same. Even if he did not "qualify" he applied. He received scholarships from groups who were not even advertising for what he was applying for. Simply because he was the only one who applied. He managed to secure $40,000 in scholarships ranging from $50-5,000. All because he put the work in from 10-12th grade. There are millions of dollars in scholarships that go unclaimed each year.

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Old 05-10-2022, 08:02 AM   #9
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My parents paid for my college, I will do the same with one caveat: The kid needs to have a good work ethic. My parents worked hard to give me opportunities, I worked hard to make the most of them. It was understood that if I screwed around and partied instead of graduating I was on my own. I'll expect the same from my future kids.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:05 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by andre3k View Post
I guess the obvious answer to this question is because parents want to or feel obligated to pay.

I have two kids, five and seven and right now I don't have any plans to funds their college education. Why? Because my parents didn't pay for my school and it probably the best thing they could have ever done for me.

It was the first time I had to figure it out on my own. If I wanted to graduate college I knew it was completely up to me financially and academically. I was able to pay my way through school with academic scholarships, working and taking out a few small loans. I graduated in 2002 with about 10k in student loans. That experience taught me hard work, planning, and eventually changed my views from being somewhat liberal to a conservative.

Whats everyone else's views on paying for their kids college? Are you delaying or postponing retirement to pay for your kids school?



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Mine are a little older than yours and I have no plans to fund college. I funded my college with scholarships and working. Lost my scholarships after figuring out how fun it was to be free and finished paying for my school by working 60+ hours a week. It wasn't easy but I wouldn't change it for the world. Now My parents did make sure that I didn't starve. There was always plenty of deer sausage and they taught me how to cook beans! If I went home for the weekend I always left with a full tank of fuel. That is all I could really ask for. Hopefully my kids see it the same way.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:10 AM   #11
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We were able to pay our kids college. We told them if they kept up good grades they were taken care of. Both graduated with honors and I was more than happy to get them started in life without debt. Both have very successful careers and would do it again . IMO, no reason not to help out if possible. YMMV.
Exactly what I did and wouldn't change it for the world!!!! If you teach your kids at an early age about money and savings and to work hard for things then everything will work out just fine. Both my kids are RN's and the oldest is going to School to become a CRNA in August!!!!!!!! When my wife and I got married we promised each other we were going to do our best and pay for their college. We started savings when they were born and never looked back. My kids got out of school with no debt and both are working hard and saving money!!!!!!
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:10 AM   #12
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I worked my way through college. But, then again, it was in the 70's and it was affordable.

Very difficult for a kid to work his/her way through school nowadays.

I saved up some money for my youngest son. He got an academic full ride...so I used that money and bought me a truck

And, like what was said above, there are alot of scholorships available...ya just gotta put in the time & effort to find them.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:12 AM   #13
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I have one that will be a Senior in High School and heading to college after that. I plan to pay for it with a few rules in place:

-In the state of Texas unless she finds a way I don't have to pay out of state tuition.
-No goofy degrees.
-She keeps her grades where they need to be.

My parents paid for mine in the beginning, but after a few semesters I decided I wanted to go to the military. When that didn't work out, and I went back to school, they probably would've resumed paying. I decided not to ask them.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:13 AM   #14
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We are paying for my daughters school. I've always planned on doing it. She has always carried a 4.0 in college and was the valedictorian in high school. As long as she is doing that, I wll continue to help her pay it. She plays volleyball, so she doesn't have time for a job in the fall. She works about 30 hours a week during the spring. She also gets a decent amount of academic scholarships each semester that pays for about 1/4 of her school. I don't see any reason for her to start her adult life in debt if she doesn't have to.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:15 AM   #15
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My parents paid for mine on a policemen and teacher's aid salaries. I earn 5 times what my Dad made at his peak. Dang sure I want to provide for my kid and I paid her undergrad. Was going to help with grad school but she wants to do that on her own. She'll come out with an astonishing amount of debt because of our ridiculous system and skyrocketing tuition. I'll be helping her for sure if she'll let me.

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Old 05-10-2022, 08:18 AM   #16
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I paid to send my dog to college. I hope that’s ok with the OP
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:18 AM   #17
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If your able to help, why wouldn’t you?
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:18 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CEO View Post
I have one that will be a Senior in High School and heading to college after that. I plan to pay for it with a few rules in place:

-In the state of Texas unless she finds a way I don't have to pay out of state tuition.
-No goofy degrees.
-She keeps her grades where they need to be.

My parents paid for mine in the beginning, but after a few semesters I decided I wanted to go to the military. When that didn't work out, and I went back to school, they probably would've resumed paying. I decided not to ask them.
^^ This. If Im paying, i still have a small influence and can set expectations. My parents helped me out and i would like to do the same for my kids. After graduation, not being in Student debt to my eyeballs was very nice. They will still have a side job for spending cash but tuition and housing i will help with.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:20 AM   #19
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I paid to send my dog to college. I hope thatís ok with the OP
mine failed.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:24 AM   #20
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Originally Posted by bullhead44 View Post
We are paying for my daughters school. I've always planned on doing it. She has always carried a 4.0 in college and was the valedictorian in high school. As long as she is doing that, I wll continue to help her pay it. She plays volleyball, so she doesn't have time for a job in the fall. She works about 30 hours a week during the spring. She also gets a decent amount of academic scholarships each semester that pays for about 1/4 of her school. I don't see any reason for her to start her adult life in debt if she doesn't have to.
Where does your daughter play volleyball?
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:28 AM   #21
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I paid for all 3 of my kids as long as they kept their grades up. All 3 graduated debt free and have great jobs now.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:37 AM   #22
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Default Why pay for kids college?

My opinion is to pay for it if it doesnít hinder or set back your retirement. No parent is obligated to pay for their kidís college education. Period.

I was fortunate to be able to pay for both of my sons college but it came with rules.

First, you better make your grades or your *** is coming home and that gravy train is over.

Second, I only paid for their college expenses. This included tuition, books and living expenses. I sat them down and we figured out line item by line item what their monthly living expenses should be and I sent that amount of money to their checking account on the first of every month.

They got zero spending money from me. I told them to get a summer job and whatever they saved from the summer is what they had to party with during the school year. I liked this because it taught them to save and then budget their spending over a period of time.

Both of them came to realize not long after they graduated how fortunate they were to not only have the education they wanted but they got to start their life off debt free. Nearly all of their friends were in a different boat.

I also told them if they decided to pursue a Masters degree I would help with that as well. Neither decided to go that route.


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Old 05-10-2022, 08:39 AM   #23
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I have made no promises in regards to college, to my son. If he receives any money it will be performance based just like the real world. He can propose a plan of action and negotiate for funding. I'm open to college, some kind of apprenticeship, or even a business opportunity.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:41 AM   #24
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I did it because my parents did it for me. The kids know they have to pay me back, by paying for their kids' education.

We saved, paid a small amount out of the checking account each month and really didn't feel any burden from it. As a matter of fact, when they both went on the college accounts, we got a small raise around here.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:50 AM   #25
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We paid for our daughters PA degree but if she hadn’t been a rock solid kid she would have been paying for her education on her own. It was made clear a long time ago she was in charge of how her future would unfold, if she buckled down and did the right thing with great grades then she was set, if she screwed up then it was on her. I know some people can’t swing it just like me and my wife’s parents couldn’t but we gave 2 options. Do good and get a free pass or screw up and do your own thing. Life’s all about choices and our kid pinches pennys and is light years ahead of where we were at her age.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:53 AM   #26
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Originally Posted by andre3k View Post
I guess the obvious answer to this question is because parents want to or feel obligated to pay.

I have two kids, five and seven and right now I don't have any plans to funds their college education. Why? Because my parents didn't pay for my school and it probably the best thing they could have ever done for me.

It was the first time I had to figure it out on my own. If I wanted to graduate college I knew it was completely up to me financially and academically. I was able to pay my way through school with academic scholarships, working and taking out a few small loans. I graduated in 2002 with about 10k in student loans. That experience taught me hard work, planning, and eventually changed my views from being somewhat liberal to a conservative.

Whats everyone else's views on paying for their kids college? Are you delaying or postponing retirement to pay for your kids school?



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That same 10K nowadays wouldn't sniff a full semesters tuition plus living costs.

I don't understand your line of thinking, but I do respect it, as my parents didn't pay for college for me either. It didn't teach me hard work or planning, my parents had already taught me that before I got to school.

I don't regret my time spent in college, or the degree I have, but dang it would have been nice to not start off in life without anything except $40K in student loan debt. If I ever have children, I imagine I would do what I could to help pay for their tuition, if they chose to pursue a higher education.
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Old 05-10-2022, 08:56 AM   #27
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It is different for everyone but if you start saving early (when they are born) and tie the money up into something compounding, or other tax deferred options, it can start to grow and build up.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:00 AM   #28
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My parents helped me as much as they could and I am thankful for it. There was an expectation that I take it serious and I did.

I have, and will, pay for most of my kids' school too and they have the same expectation to take it serious.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:00 AM   #29
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where does your daughter play volleyball?
wtamu
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:02 AM   #30
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my mom paid for my tuition and apartment, i paid for for my books and whatever spending money i wanted. my last 1.5 years of college i worked 30-40hrs a week and more during the summer at enterprise rent a car.

we will help our boys as much as we can, the cost of a college education has gotten so ridiculous that i would hate for them to graduate with that collar around their neck.

if they dont want to go, i will support that as well. we have talked about learning a trade, i dont feel like college is the end all anymore with the demand for a good welder/hvac/plumber/electrician.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:03 AM   #31
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Im voting for democrats so the gov.will pay for my kids school
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:11 AM   #32
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Originally Posted by DUKFVR View Post
We were able to pay our kids college. We told them if they kept up good grades they were taken care of. Both graduated with honors and I was more than happy to get them started in life without debt. Both have very successful careers and would do it again . IMO, no reason not to help out if possible. YMMV.
Same here, we were willing to do what we could to help our kids get a head start in life. This also means helping them to be financially responsible. Both worked in college and they both just graduated a few years ago. Both make great money and have almost zero debt. Both are investing and saving. My wife and I feel like we want to give them a better chance than we had starting out. I'd do it again.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:12 AM   #33
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My dog is smarter than your kid !
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:13 AM   #34
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For parents with young kids start a plan and start saving now. When it comes time donít give them a thing. Let them earn it. Pay them to get good grades as has been mentioned already by several folks. Too many kids these days are given everything.

On the career choice side, help your kids decide what is right for them. College is not for everyone do not place unrealistic expectations on your kids. The everyone needs a college degree BS is nothing more then a 1.6 trillion money grab. Help them understand they can make a nice living working in some of the trades and technology. Teach them about the pit falls of getting everything on credit now and the financial rewards of wise investment.

That is all. Take it with a grain of salt as I donít have kids.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:16 AM   #35
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My dad helped a little bit because even with loans and all there was money to pay and my 2-3 jobs just werent enough to cover it.
If you want your kid to learn to work, college is the last place to learn that lol. Dont mean dont have em work, but taking on stupid debt to learn to work is stupid. First time its worth something bigger, but college expenses are insane. Even if I want to, i know i wont be able to cover my sons college expense in whole by the time hes there. But itd be dumb of me to not give him a fighting chance.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:18 AM   #36
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Originally Posted by Pedernal View Post
For parents with young kids start a plan and start saving now. When it comes time donít give them a thing. Let them earn it. Pay them to get good grades as has been mentioned already by several folks. Too many kids these days are given everything.

On the career choice side, help your kids decide what is right for them. College is not for everyone do not place unrealistic expectations on your kids. The everyone needs a college degree BS is nothing more then a 1.6 trillion money grab. Help them understand they can make a nice living working in some of the trades and technology. Teach them about the pit falls of getting everything on credit now and the financial rewards of wise investment.

That is all. Take it with a grain of salt as I donít have kids.
No offense intended but you not having kinds renders your opinion useless, most parents want their kids to be better off then they were at the same age. I agree not all kids need to go to college but long term they will be head and shoulders ahead of those without it later on in life.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:18 AM   #37
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Mine wasn't paid for and I didn't pay for my kids. If they wanted to go to college they paid for it. I thought it was more important to teach them a good work ethic and to start saving early.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:19 AM   #38
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I have 4 kids. All had the same offer. In state, passing grades, I pay. Goof off and it becomes your problem. No 5 year plan. Oldest is a BSN nurse. Youngest daughter is is a patient advocate for Kaiser Permanente. One is a mechanic, he hated school. Youngest son is homeless, drug addicted, and a drain on my soul. If they will go to school, help them. It does them more good on the front end of their life than anything you can leave them at the end of your life.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:21 AM   #39
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My kids have already proven to be hard working and responsible. I don't need to make them pay for college as long as I can afford to send them without messing up my future... with the caveat that grades are kept up and I know they are working hard at it.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:25 AM   #40
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We were able to pay our kids college. We told them if they kept up good grades they were taken care of. Both graduated with honors and I was more than happy to get them started in life without debt. Both have very successful careers and would do it again . IMO, no reason not to help out if possible. YMMV.
I share a similar sentiment. I've had 529 plans setup for my two girls since before birth. The money won't be given to them, they'll have to earn it.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:27 AM   #41
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No offense intended but you not having kinds renders your opinion useless, most parents want their kids to be better off then they were at the same age. I agree not all kids need to go to college but long term they will be head and shoulders ahead of those without it later on in life.
No offense taken, but donít discount my advice so easily. I have nephews that I am currently helping out.

What exactly is it that is wrong with my advice??
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:28 AM   #42
Kong
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No offense taken, but don’t discount my advice so easily. I have nephews that I am currently helping out.

What exactly is it that is wrong with my advice??

If you don’t know that answer then I can’t explain it to you,, I paid for my nieces RN schooling as well but it’s not the same as your own kid. I’m not trying to offend you but your own kid has a different meaning.

Last edited by Kong; 05-10-2022 at 09:30 AM.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:32 AM   #43
TransPecos
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I have one starting in the fall. Tuition is $35K a year. He got an academic scholarship for $15K a year. The way I look at it he did his part and he wants to go, so I will gladly help him do it. I graduated from college debt free because my folks did it for me.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:32 AM   #44
solocam_aggie
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I had to pay my way through college. Made it a priority after college and paid them all off.

I did set up a college fund for both kids and made a sizable deposit in both to start gaining, but that will be it. Anything else theyíll have to cover.


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Old 05-10-2022, 09:38 AM   #45
Bayouboy
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No offense intended but you not having kinds renders your opinion useless, most parents want their kids to be better off then they were at the same age. I agree not all kids need to go to college but long term they will be head and shoulders ahead of those without it later on in life.
Depends what their degree is in. Someone learning a good skilled trade that is in demand can make great money. Even more than some jobs that demand a degree.

Last edited by Bayouboy; 05-10-2022 at 10:11 AM.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:38 AM   #46
Pineywoods
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No offense intended but you not having kinds renders your opinion useless, most parents want their kids to be better off then they were at the same age. I agree not all kids need to go to college but long term they will be head and shoulders ahead of those without it later on in life.
I find this to be an inaccurate statement. I believe some degrees are worth less than they ever have been but cost more than they ever have. Someone that is smart, has a good work ethic and drive can succeed and do very well for themselves without college. I make six figures with a high school diploma and have many many friends that also do. Many of them mastered a trade or are business owners doing extremely well financially with only a high school diploma, or in some cases, not even that. I feel college is pushed far too heavily on a lot of kids as a necessity to ever go anywhere in life. My daughter that's a Junior makes straight A's and is in the top three in her class. She will undoubtedly have scholarship opportunities to go to college but has zero desire to do so. She wants to go to cosmetology school and have her own business one day. My son is a sophomore and wants to be in law enforcement. I think that we should be encouraging our kids to find something they're passionate about and work hard to pursue that and be the best at whatever that is. That may or may not involve a piece of paper from a college or a huge salary.

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Old 05-10-2022, 09:38 AM   #47
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For parents with young kids start a plan and start saving now. When it comes time donít give them a thing. Let them earn it. Pay them to get good grades as has been mentioned already by several folks. Too many kids these days are given everything.

On the career choice side, help your kids decide what is right for them. College is not for everyone do not place unrealistic expectations on your kids. The everyone needs a college degree BS is nothing more then a 1.6 trillion money grab. Help them understand they can make a nice living working in some of the trades and technology. Teach them about the pit falls of getting everything on credit now and the financial rewards of wise investment.

That is all. Take it with a grain of salt as I donít have kids.
I have been in the education business for a long time now and I agree that not all kids are college material. They do all need some sort of skill to make a living with. If thats college and parents can afford to help them out, they should in my opinion. If thats a trade school, the same should apply.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:41 AM   #48
Pedernal
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If you don’t know that answer then I can’t explain it to you,, I paid for my nieces RN schooling as well but it’s not the same as your own kid. I’m not trying to offend you but your own kid has a different meaning.
Not offending me at all. I think I hear what your saying, basically your insinuating that I can’t care about their future success as if they were my own. You couldn’t be more wrong.

Stats like 50 % of college graduates aren’t even working in the fields they graduated in. Some graduates that owe .25 of a quarter million dollars are making around $30K a year. These are some of the stats being put out on multiple business talk shows. Again college isn’t for everyone.

Last edited by Pedernal; 05-10-2022 at 09:46 AM.
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:44 AM   #49
marc.munoz31
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Originally Posted by Pineywoods View Post
I find this to be an inaccurate statement. I believe some degrees are worth less than they ever have been but cost more than they ever have. Someone that is smart, has a good work ethic and drive can succeed and do very well for themselves without college. I make six figures with a high school diploma and have many many friends that also do. Many of them mastered a trade or are business owners doing extremely well financially with only a high school diploma, or in some cases, not even that. I feel college is pushed far too heavily on a lot of kids as a necessity to ever go anywhere in life. My daughter that's a Junior makes straight A's and is in the top three in her class. She will undoubtedly have scholarship opportunities to go to college but has zero desire to do so. She wants to go to cosmetology school and have her own business one day. My son is a sophomore and wants to be in law enforcement. I think that we should be encouraging our kids to find something they're passionate about and work hard to pursue that and be the best at whatever that is. That may or may not involve a piece of paper from a college or a huge salary.
Well said!
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Old 05-10-2022, 09:45 AM   #50
Kong
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Originally Posted by Pineywoods View Post
I find this to be an inaccurate statement. I believe degrees are worth less than they ever have been but cost more than they ever have. Someone that is smart, has a good work ethic and drive can succeed and do very well for themselves without college. I make six figures with a high school diploma and have many many friends that also do. Many of them mastered a trade or are business owners doing extremely well financially with only a high school diploma, or in some cases, not even that. I feel college is pushed far too heavily on a lot of kids as a necessity to ever go anywhere in life. My daughter that's a Junior makes straight A's and is in the top three in her class. She will undoubtedly have scholarship opportunities to go to college but has zero desire to do so. She wants to go to cosmetology school and have her own business one day. My son is a sophomore and wants to be in law enforcement. I think that we should be encouraging our kids to find something they're passionate about and work hard to pursue that and be the best at whatever that is. That may or may not involve a piece of paper from a college or a huge salary.

I get what your saying and agree with you for the most part, I didnít finish my education and make well past the 6 figure number but that piece of paper will allow them with some experience to get a job anywhere in the country where I canít do that. My mom owned several salons before she retired so itís definitely doable but if weíre being honest itís a much harder road to get to the same spot.
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