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Old 11-10-2021, 12:43 PM   #1
Howdy
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Join Date: Jul 2021
Location: Deer Park
Hunt In: Goldthwaite, D'hanis
Default What are your favorite funny sayings/comebacks?

Some of mine that come to mind are:

"You think you can hurt my feelings? I used to hold the flashlight for my dad."

"Nobody tells me what to do. My wife don't even tell me what to do. She says I can wash the dishes with hot or cold water."

"Slicker than a harpooned hippo on a banana tree."

"If you cant weld good, weld a lot."
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Old 11-10-2021, 01:38 PM   #2
ny bowhunter
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Location: Ohio, USA
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"You should see the other guy."
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Old 11-10-2021, 01:45 PM   #3
boy wonder
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When it's really dark - "darker than a sack full of bats" .
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Old 11-10-2021, 02:22 PM   #4
Lynn21
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Location: Mesquite,texas
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It ain’t who you know, it’s who you snow.
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Old 11-10-2021, 02:25 PM   #5
Smart
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Location: Denton, TX
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Like playing cards with my brothers kids.....


Son you're gonna die of Windex poisoning if you keep likkin' winders like that.
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Old 11-10-2021, 02:30 PM   #6
Smart
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Location: Denton, TX
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You just gonna stand there with your teeth in your mouth are you gonna get to work?
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Old 11-10-2021, 02:40 PM   #7
jshouse
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military the only way
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Old 11-10-2021, 02:47 PM   #8
CSanders
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That’s what she said
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Old 11-10-2021, 02:50 PM   #9
bobc
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Location: Temple
Hunt In: Bell County, New Mexico
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jshouse View Post
military the only way
Haha. Awesome.
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Old 11-10-2021, 02:53 PM   #10
FVR JR
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"the next time you have a thought, let it go..."
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Old 11-10-2021, 04:10 PM   #11
stryker93
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Location: Seguin, TX
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"I've been called worse by much better people."
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Old 11-10-2021, 04:20 PM   #12
3rdCoastHunter
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Don’t sweat the petty stuff and definitely don’t pet the sweaty stuff
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Old 11-10-2021, 04:24 PM   #13
kcnatural
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Location: Goldthwaite
Hunt In: Mills CO.
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If a half pint makes you half tight, does a whole pint make your hole tight?
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Old 11-10-2021, 04:26 PM   #14
Walker
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Location: San Antonio
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Man you're sharp today. Have razor soup for breakfast?
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Old 11-10-2021, 04:55 PM   #15
Gumbo Man
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Hey your pretty funny. You should be on a stage. There’s one leaving at midnight.

If you borrow from Peter to pay Paul eventually Peter will get sore. And you just can’t do buisiness with a sore Peter.

Last edited by Gumbo Man; 11-10-2021 at 04:57 PM.
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:26 PM   #16
Pstraw
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How'd that work out for you?
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:33 PM   #17
Lone_Wolf
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Hunt In: Bosque Hill McLennan Navarro Counties
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It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:36 PM   #18
corps2010
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Location: Nacogdoches
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"If I wanted any lip from you, I'd unzip my pants"
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:39 PM   #19
rjtkdplus
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Location: Lockhart
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Never do anything half fast! To my son many times.
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:45 PM   #20
enewman
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Location: Odessa TX
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Haha Feelings, I don't have any feelings. Just ask my kids.
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:45 PM   #21
xman59
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if your feeling a little froggy ,,, jump!
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:47 PM   #22
bullets13
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Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: Fannett
Hunt In: Marion Co, Jefferson Co
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You should be on the radio… so I could turn you down.
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:48 PM   #23
enewman
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Location: Odessa TX
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He s happier than a puppy with two peters.
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:49 PM   #24
joel45acp
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Hunt In: Land Baron in Rocksprings TX
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Let’s Go Brandon…..
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:50 PM   #25
GarGuy
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Let's go Brandon... my new favorire
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:51 PM   #26
GarGuy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joel45acp View Post
Let’s Go Brandon…..
We posted at the same time
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Old 11-10-2021, 05:54 PM   #27
Brush to Bay
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Location: 1456 E. Cemetery Rd.
Hunt In: Hallettsville, Tx 77964
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"Suprised? If i woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet I wouldnt be more suprised!" Clark W. Griswold - Christmas Vacation
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Old 11-10-2021, 06:04 PM   #28
joel45acp
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Hunt In: Land Baron in Rocksprings TX
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GarGuy View Post
We posted at the same time
Actually, I beat you by a few seconds….lol
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Old 11-10-2021, 06:14 PM   #29
DedDuk
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Location: Onalaska
Hunt In: East and West TX
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Dont take a chit without wiping your ars....
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Old 11-10-2021, 07:37 PM   #30
KGreene
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Join Date: Sep 2021
Hunt In: Hopkins County
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Not my monkey, not my circus.
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Old 11-10-2021, 07:41 PM   #31
SmTx
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Location: San Marcos/Hempstead
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Does a snake drag its balls?
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Old 11-10-2021, 07:46 PM   #32
Gumbo Man
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Location: Livingston Texas
Hunt In: Onalaska Texas
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It always did take 2 of y’all to mess with 1 of me.
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Old 11-10-2021, 07:52 PM   #33
doghouse
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Location: Goldthwaite
Hunt In: Mills County
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From an older gentleman years ago. When someone says thank you his response was always, some pay that way and others pay cash.
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Old 11-10-2021, 07:59 PM   #34
acc05R1
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Location: DFW
Hunt In: Public land
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It’s as easy as nailing jello to a tree!
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:03 PM   #35
rjet
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Location: Scroggins, Tx
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That dog barking at you bit me a long time ago.
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:09 PM   #36
BigL
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Location: Round Rock
Hunt In: San Saba
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I left my mask on your mom's nightstand
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:16 PM   #37
bbbuck
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Location: Gunter, Tx
Hunt In: Public Land
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Worthless as teets on a boar hog.
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:18 PM   #38
Mahan
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Location: Lubbock
Hunt In: Haskell
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"Brand new second hand", most of the stuff I buy...
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:18 PM   #39
Aggiehunter08
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: West Texas
Hunt In: The World
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I can lead a horse to water but I’m not gonna suck his *** to get him started.
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:22 PM   #40
krtnorris
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Location: Katy
Hunt In: Texas & Ohio
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I’ve been beat by bigger.
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:22 PM   #41
krtnorris
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Location: Katy
Hunt In: Texas & Ohio
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This is Abby my current wife.
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:23 PM   #42
miket
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Location: Plantersville
Hunt In: Grimes County, Victoria
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If I wanted any crap out of you I'd squeeze your head.

When someone burps out loud, " thats the most intellegent thing Ive heard come out of your mouth all day"
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:23 PM   #43
krtnorris
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Location: Katy
Hunt In: Texas & Ohio
Default

When in doubt buy 3.
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:26 PM   #44
miket
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Location: Plantersville
Hunt In: Grimes County, Victoria
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Best part of you ran down your mommas leg.
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:40 PM   #45
brown dogs
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Location: Madison, Ms
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Never smell a gift fish.
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:46 PM   #46
gemini2759
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Port Isabel
Hunt In: Jim Hogg, public land
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I've done that before you were a wet spot on your parents bed.

Sent from my moto g power (2021) using Tapatalk
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:47 PM   #47
ThisLadyHunts
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Join Date: Mar 2020
Location: Central Texas
Hunt In: Austin, Boerne, Wyoming, South America
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I have many of them but I didn't realize until just now how very few of them are suitable for general audiences.
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Old 11-10-2021, 08:49 PM   #48
brown dogs
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Location: Madison, Ms
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Have I ever lied to you where you could tell it?
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Old 11-10-2021, 09:44 PM   #49
solocam_aggie
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Bastrop
Hunt In: Bastrop
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Joe ain’t scared of work, he’ll sit right beside it.


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Old 11-10-2021, 10:26 PM   #50
Low Fence
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Location: Quitman, Tx.
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What don’t kill you makes you stronger… except bears. Bears will kill you
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