Has your wife fallen back in love with you?

[jer_james]

As has been said - words start the process, but the habits and actions you build upon will tell the actual story.

Make plans - write schedules for yourself. Have constant reminders. It won’t come natural, but nothing does if you’re experiencing real change. It will be work.

Also, not to be negative. But creating positive habits for yourself will benefit you no matter what happens between you and the Mrs.

[Pineywoods]

Glad to read things are getting better. Just keep pressing on in that direction and don't get complacent, because it's easy to do. You just keep focusing on what you can do to love your wife more and let your wife handle the MIL situation. At this point, I don't think it's wise to address that issue outside of conversations with your wife about it. Just keep self reflecting and being honest with yourself as you recognize your flaws. We all have them. Don't stop at recognizing them... be intentional about turning away from those attitudes and action that have been destructive in the past. God can restore what man messes up. Just trust Him and let Him teach you how to love her like Christ loves the church.

[Turtlewax]

1 year and 3 days ago I started this thread. Before I go any further, I will say, we are still together and our relationship is stronger today that it ever has been.

I have become a totally different person from where I was a year ago. Attitude, health and perspectives have all changed for the better. I have been working full time since December and couldn't be happier......well as happy as one could be at work...lol.

My wife laughs and flirts and smiles again. It is so great to see that beautiful smile of hers. It took a few months in the beginning to prove to her I was serious and once she saw the commitment, things started changing. Everyday it got a little easier and easier, and eventually time melted together and here we are.

I turned to the green screen for help for various reasons. First of all the love for God on this forum is amazing. Without him I don't know if it would have turned out the same. It helped us tremendously reading through the advice each and every one of you offered. She knows this forum is full of good folks and understands the importance of their voices. It also comforted her in seeing that other couples have problems, like us, and were able to work through them.

Things I learned over the last year.

Patience is the number one. I take a different approach now and its working. I've learned to calm down and react to situations with a different perspective.

Learning to put someone else first each time or try the best to. I don't prioritize myself before her, as I did before. Now its a 50/50 or she's first depending on what it is.

Communication. We learned so much more about each other the first 6 months. I'll admit it's trailed off a bit here recently, but we are both solid and moving forward hand in hand.

Happiness. This is the best one. I was an angry person inside, childhood issues that haunted me into adulthood that I guess I couldn't shake off. I've learned to live beyond that. I learned to stop thinking about past issues and move onto the future. It changed everything.

Therapists are not for me. I had one for 3 sessions tele-remote. It was not a good experience and ended on somewhat of a sour note. Maybe just a bad pairing but it lived up to every stigma I have ever had of them. I turned to close trusted family and friends for advice. That was my lifeline and it helped tremendously.

Live life like everyday is your last! Everyday is a brand new start to a fresh experience.

Thank you to all that posted and helped a year ago. I often came back and read through these when I needed the encouragement. Not everyday was great but you grind through them to keep the streak alive.

A special thanks to Tmurray, your post is why I have stayed away for a year. You made me realize that building each day into a month and then compounding those months over time is what I needed to do. Your post gave me the drive and incentive to prove to some, that people can change if they are so willing. Thank you sir, for that.

[JayB]

I am man enough to admit, this brought a tear to my eye.

Thanks be unto God for the love He has for us and your are able to demonstrate to your wonderful bride.

Don't stop.

[CentralTXHunter]

Allergies are acting up here too. Seems to always happen to me when I see the wonderful workings of God.

Remember to continually pursue your bride. Don’t rest or get comfortable. Actively love her everyday and continue to build on this relationship.


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[RascalArms]

Great to hear such a good update. Thanks for sharing and congrats

[Shane]

Praise God! And a big WAY TO GO to you and your wife for putting in the WORK to build your marriage.

Like the saying goes..... Divorce is hard. Marriage is hard. Choose your hard.

Keep up the good work, y'all!

[IvoryRoot]

Great news that things are going your way. Congratulations

[glpoe1]

Your post almost made me cry for you. I see lots of support and very good advice for you. I also see a good effort on from both of you to stay together and good for you. My prayers are with you and just know you are not alone in this fight. Love your Wife, Love your Lord and keep putting her first and letting her know she matters to you. Oh yeah, been there, been the bad guy and been the victim. One marriage two marriages didn't work but my third wife and I are dedicated to each other and no one else.

[MisterSanders]

Sounds to me like shes just trying to get you to be an adult again.

[Quackerbox]

Congratulations sir!! Took guts to spill yours.

Sounds to me like shes just trying to get you to be an adult again.

You didn't read the whole thing

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[Artos]

Love this place...

[kruppa24]

Right on Brother!

[Preacher Man]

Man that’s awesome

[Gumbo Man]

Best thread of the day. Congrats to you and your bride sir. I pray that y’all are together for the rest of your lives and then beyond.