any good disfunctional family christmas stories

[Iehooligan11b]

He was hitting your wife and you gave him 3 verbal warnings? My wife's family would be giving me the cold shoulder for letting it go that long. Not saying you handled it wrong because I wasn't in your shoes but I just can't see how they would have expected that situation to end any better. It could have been justifiably way worse for him.

I’m on the same page as you.
Not to diss the op of this post, but I couldn’t fathom watching someone repeatedly assault my wife and just keep telling them to stop. And then to go straight for drawing my pistol. At first sight I would be hands on. There would not be multiple verbal warnings and wouldn’t feel the need to pull a pistol when he needed an *** whooping.

[locolobo]

I thought I had a dysfunctional family. Mom had 6 brothers who were all drunks and all had done time, and 2 sisters whose husbands were also drunks. We all got together @ Grandma's house for Christmas dinner every year and never anything like some of the stories here.
Worst that ever happened was setting the pasture behind Grandma's house on fire during a bottle rocket war. Kids against adults. Grandma was pizzed but no punches were thrown and all food was eaten.

Gotta keep this going for 2018!

Merry Christmas to all on the Green Screen!

[Chew]

There was the time my mom burned the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve to teach me and my brother a lesson.

We had drove her crazy (for real) about opening presents. She let us open one and we wouldn't shut up about opening more. She snapped and opened all the gifts for us and then dragged the tree to the burn pile and lit it.

It was a very quiet, somber Christmas morning. My little brother cried like a b&$#@. We never mentioned opening gifts early again.

[aac_shooter]

I have 2 stories, but they are from past Thanksgivings. My wife would likely skin me alive if I posted either of them.

[Iehooligan11b]

There was the time my mom burned the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve to teach me and my brother a lesson.

We had drove her crazy (for real) about opening presents. She let us open one and we wouldn't shut up about opening more. She snapped and opened all the gifts for us and then dragged the tree to the burn pile and lit it.

It was a very quiet, somber Christmas morning. My little brother cried like a b&$#@. We never mentioned opening gifts early again.

It got results. Haha I’m gonna have to keep that idea in my back pocket.

[Quackerbox]

Im expecting my wifes pot head nephew with no job to spring an ultrasound pic on my mother in law by noon today. Swear his waitress girlfriend has a bump and theyve been wearing rings since Thanksgiving.





Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk

[sharkhunter]

First Christmas after I married my wife. All of my in-laws are pretty great, other than my wife's brother. A real "piece of work", he would spend all his money on his vehicles, then refuse to get anything for his parents or sister. The only reason he got something for his mother, was (and I quote) "Shut [her] the f*** up" (spoken to her face).

Wife and I had just found out that parenthood for us would be a certified miracle, so all the family talk at dinner Christmas Eve, about "when's the kids coming?" was really wearing thin on my wife. Her brother, posts a message on Facebook(while we're at the dinner table, knowing the entire situation) about how happy he is for his sister and her new family, and that he was looking forward to our having kids. And he tags her on facebook, so everyone we know on both sides of the family is getting this notification about it. Both of our phones start blowing up with people saying "OMG CONGRATULATIONS!", to which we have to explain the situation.

My wife at this point is crying, really upset, which leads him to make more offhand comments about how stupid she is. I'm a pretty level headed guy, but admittedly I get a little hot tempered when someone hurts my wife. I start closing distance, when their grandmother(who's 75+ y/o, about 4'10", and maybe a 100 lbs soaking wet) steps in front of me, and quite loudly says(prompting me by my full name), "It's Christmas Eve, so you'll have to just turn the other cheek... (and turns over her shoulder) even if he is being complete ***hole..." This from one of the sweetest little old ladies I'd ever met.

Fast forward nine months, we hadn't spoken to him since that 'event'(a big deal since he and my wife up till we got married, would talk multiple times a day...). We run into him at their parent's place. Apparently he had unplugged a freezer that I'd been keeping in their garage, full of groceries and venison(which all spoiled). She confronts him, and that is responded to with him punching her. I'm not sure how it got to that point. I just hear her from inside the house, scream out "stop, get off of me". I look out to see him man-handling her, throw her face first into the side of his truck(hard enough to for me to hear the "thunk" from inside the house), and punch her in the head. While yelling obscenities about her. I step outside already mad, and yell at him 3 times to get off her, his response was laugh, and hit her again. The 4th time i ordered him to let go, it was backed up with my pistol being drawn. Now that I had his attention, and he was threatening me, the pistol went back in the holster, and placed on the hood of the car.

Yet, I'm the one everyone resents, and no one will bother to talk to me about it.

*shrugs*

Your a better person then me for sure.

[sharkhunter]

There was the time my mom burned the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve to teach me and my brother a lesson.

We had drove her crazy (for real) about opening presents. She let us open one and we wouldn't shut up about opening more. She snapped and opened all the gifts for us and then dragged the tree to the burn pile and lit it.

It was a very quiet, somber Christmas morning. My little brother cried like a b&$#@. We never mentioned opening gifts early again.

Wow !!

[Radar]

My uncle Bill is 4 years older than me and we grew up together. He has always been the wilder one and we have some history. Our Christmas Day usually was meeting up,eating dinner around two , gift exchanges and then playing cards and drinking a few.

One year someone brought a couple quarts of corn likker. Bill drank too much and got wild. Dad and me took him outside and put him in the front yard. He was tore up from the floor up and hollering, fighting Indians and acting a fool. Finally he got sick and puked so hard his false teeth fell out. One of the dogs grabbed them teeth and went under the front porch. I could hear the dog crunching up them teeth. We grabbed Bill by his arms drug him up on the porch couch and left him.

The next day Bill was wandering around in the yard looking for them teeth. My grandpa told him that if follered the dog for two days he might get them back. I then had to explain to Bill what happened with them teeth.

[tmstuk]

I crop dusted the in-laws at the Christmas dinner table to see who they would blame it on...

Well.......who did they blame it on?

[justindiehl7]

First Christmas after I married my wife. All of my in-laws are pretty great, other than my wife's brother. A real "piece of work", he would spend all his money on his vehicles, then refuse to get anything for his parents or sister. The only reason he got something for his mother, was (and I quote) "Shut [her] the f*** up" (spoken to her face).

Wife and I had just found out that parenthood for us would be a certified miracle, so all the family talk at dinner Christmas Eve, about "when's the kids coming?" was really wearing thin on my wife. Her brother, posts a message on Facebook(while we're at the dinner table, knowing the entire situation) about how happy he is for his sister and her new family, and that he was looking forward to our having kids. And he tags her on facebook, so everyone we know on both sides of the family is getting this notification about it. Both of our phones start blowing up with people saying "OMG CONGRATULATIONS!", to which we have to explain the situation.

My wife at this point is crying, really upset, which leads him to make more offhand comments about how stupid she is. I'm a pretty level headed guy, but admittedly I get a little hot tempered when someone hurts my wife. I start closing distance, when their grandmother(who's 75+ y/o, about 4'10", and maybe a 100 lbs soaking wet) steps in front of me, and quite loudly says(prompting me by my full name), "It's Christmas Eve, so you'll have to just turn the other cheek... (and turns over her shoulder) even if he is being complete ***hole..." This from one of the sweetest little old ladies I'd ever met.

Fast forward nine months, we hadn't spoken to him since that 'event'(a big deal since he and my wife up till we got married, would talk multiple times a day...). We run into him at their parent's place. Apparently he had unplugged a freezer that I'd been keeping in their garage, full of groceries and venison(which all spoiled). She confronts him, and that is responded to with him punching her. I'm not sure how it got to that point. I just hear her from inside the house, scream out "stop, get off of me". I look out to see him man-handling her, throw her face first into the side of his truck(hard enough to for me to hear the "thunk" from inside the house), and punch her in the head. While yelling obscenities about her. I step outside already mad, and yell at him 3 times to get off her, his response was laugh, and hit her again. The 4th time i ordered him to let go, it was backed up with my pistol being drawn. Now that I had his attention, and he was threatening me, the pistol went back in the holster, and placed on the hood of the car.

Yet, I'm the one everyone resents, and no one will bother to talk to me about it.

*shrugs*

Well did you whoop his arse????


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[flywise]

Just walked out back to show my wife her new grill and we could hear a really loud obnoxious argument about 200 yards away. Apparently someone did not someone else at their house.i was glad I didn't hear gun shots

[TxAg]

There was the time my mom burned the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve to teach me and my brother a lesson.

We had drove her crazy (for real) about opening presents. She let us open one and we wouldn't shut up about opening more. She snapped and opened all the gifts for us and then dragged the tree to the burn pile and lit it.

It was a very quiet, somber Christmas morning. My little brother cried like a b&$#@. We never mentioned opening gifts early again.

Some heroes don't wear capes. Your mom is legit!

[SmTx]

Pretty sure I saw the continuation of some domestic violence in George West today when I stopped for some beer.

Lady had a big gash on her face and some old man eventually followed her up there. She yelled at him to get away from her for a bit.

I watched for a little while(praying I wouldn't have to go whoop an old man on christmas) until I realized if she did want to make a get away I was blocking her in.

Figured if she wanted the cops involved neither of them would be at the gas station.

So.. which one of y'all have kin in GW?

Sent from my SM-G935V using Tapatalk

[RascalArms]

My uncle Bill is 4 years older than me and we grew up together. He has always been the wilder one and we have some history. Our Christmas Day usually was meeting up,eating dinner around two , gift exchanges and then playing cards and drinking a few.

One year someone brought a couple quarts of corn likker. Bill drank too much and got wild. Dad and me took him outside and put him in the front yard. He was tore up from the floor up and hollering, fighting Indians and acting a fool. Finally he got sick and puked so hard his false teeth fell out. One of the dogs grabbed them teeth and went under the front porch. I could hear the dog crunching up them teeth. We grabbed Bill by his arms drug him up on the porch couch and left him.

The next day Bill was wandering around in the yard looking for them teeth. My grandpa told him that if follered the dog for two days he might get them back. I then had to explain to Bill what happened with them teeth.

This sentence says a lot about the family dynamics here Jeff
I mean.....what red blooded God fearing family doesn’t have a good couch sitting on their front porch?