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School situation with my 12 yr old

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    Originally posted by mikemorvan View Post
    Just for another movie reference, i'd refer "Cool Hand Luke". Luke got it handed to him by DragLine. But Luke won much respect and didn't have to fight again.

    I know this is a real situation, not movie / fantasy land. But sticking up for yourself has merit. Not everyone is going to win, but sometimes a kids gotta do what a kids gotta do.
    I agree and tell my boys the same

    Comment


      I am all for standing up to the bullies. But many you should think about before telling your kid that, depending on who is. The bully might actually can fight and have far more physical size and strength than your kids in some situations. You could be sending your kid to the slaughter in some situations.

      Comment


        Originally posted by GarGuy View Post
        Growing up,I was always a big kid for my age and could hold my own. When i was 12, there was a 15 year old that rode my bus. he was huge and mean. He would treat me terrible and i was scared to death of him. it was a daily think morning and evening for him to push me around, pull my ears, rub my face on the bus floor etc. Bus driver knew it and did nothing.

        I got to the point that i was nausiated at the thought of riding the bus and begged for someone to take me to school. My grandfather took me and as we rode, he asked me what the heck was wrong with me. i told him the whole story. he told I was riding the bus going forward and that if i didnt deal with the situation he would deal with me worse than the boy was.

        The next morning when that kid got on the bus he walked straight to me and said i was in his seat. I stood up, loaded up with all i had and hit him right between the eyes. he went down with a severely broken nose. the bus had not even started moving yet and the driver helped him off the bus. I was taken to the office at school and explained the entire situation much of which the driver confirmed. I was not punished. When i got home i told my granddad what happened and he said i dealt with it well.

        the boy missed school the next day but the following, he got on the bus with two big black eyes and tape across the bridge of his nose. I was scared to death as he walked up and I just hit him again just like i had done two days before right on that broken nose. talk about a blood trail! the principal did not see the humor in that one.

        That ended it though the fellow grew up and is some what of a friend to this day. As a matter of fact, i think he might just be a TBHer. No telling how long that would have gone on had I not gathered the courage to confront the situation.
        And THAT is how you turn a kid into a man. Both of you. He needed to learn too. I stood up to a few bullies in school, and all turned out for the better. A couple I didnt and I regret it.

        Comment


          Originally posted by Captain39 View Post
          I am all for standing up to the bullies. But many you should think about before telling your kid that, depending on who is. The bully might actually can fight and have far more physical size and strength than your kids in some situations. You could be sending your kid to the slaughter in some situations.
          Before anyone thinks I think I am some tough guy, Im not. I hate any kind of confrontation. Im not particularly small, but certainly not a big guy.

          I told my son to be sure he is ready for a fight when he was ready to stop the bullying. I made it clear that he may not win. But that winning is not the point. Self respect is, and letting them know that there is a price to pay for bullying him.

          In the end, being bullied and not defending yourself is worse than getting your butt kicked.

          Comment


            Originally posted by miket View Post
            Before anyone thinks I think I am some tough guy, Im not. I hate any kind of confrontation. Im not particularly small, but certainly not a big guy.

            I told my son to be sure he is ready for a fight when he was ready to stop the bullying. I made it clear that he may not win. But that winning is not the point. Self respect is, and letting them know that there is a price to pay for bullying him.

            In the end, being bullied and not defending yourself is worse than getting your butt kicked.
            Word.^^^^ I was the little guy so constantly picked on in middle school and most of high school until I finally grew bigger than most of the "bullies". I never backed down from one fight and found myself in the principle's office often. He told me I needed to stop fighting and told him I wasnt going to back down if they started it. I got whipped plenty but they always had some marks on them and knew they had been in a fight. That whole fight fair is BS. Once the coaches pulled a big guy and me apart. When they pulled him back they had his arms pulled back and breasted up.....I jerked myself away from the coach holding me and ran up and hit him with everything I could in the jaw and he buckled at the knees. He never bothered me again. Im pretty sure the coaches laughed when it happened. Another kid was bothering me pretty relentlessly and decided to do it again outside after lunch one day. It was cold out and he was wearing a jacket. I grabbed him by the jacket and used it to sling him into a metal door. It knocked him silly and I took his head and slammed it into the door quite a few times. He didnt bother me again.

            Times have changed for sure I probably would have been suspended numerous times if I was going to school now.

            Comment


              Update....

              I met with the principle who is a good guy, we've generically talked a few times over the last couple of years.
              He did some investigating and talked to several kids and a teacher that were there prior to meeting with them.
              My son as well as the other kid were forthcoming and honest when asked what happened and the names that were called. Apparently this kid has been in trouble the last couple of years for name calling and running his mouth.
              The principle talked with the them, made the kids talk to each other. They both have to come check in with him twice a week, as well as the teacher that has then in a class together. He said the policy is to suspend then both, but he wasn't going to do that. They have a pep rally today at school that they can't go to because they will be in a classroom together helping a teacher.
              He said both of the boys seem to be Alpha kids and could be roll models for the 6th graders so they have to sit with and mentor them at lunch for a few weeks.

              Our meeting went well, the kids hopefully resolved their issue as well. He was meeting with the other kids dad shortly after me.
              Last edited by Texas8point; 10-19-2018, 04:52 AM.

              Comment


                In our society if there is no record of it it did not happen
                Send the principle an email
                About the bullying your son is going thru. Make sure to get dates and witnesses. Never know 40 years from
                Now your son may run for president and he will
                Be known as the school bully. Just saying in writing will
                Usually get there attention

                Comment


                  Originally posted by miket View Post
                  Before anyone thinks I think I am some tough guy, Im not. I hate any kind of confrontation. Im not particularly small, but certainly not a big guy.

                  I told my son to be sure he is ready for a fight when he was ready to stop the bullying. I made it clear that he may not win. But that winning is not the point. Self respect is, and letting them know that there is a price to pay for bullying him.

                  In the end, being bullied and not defending yourself is worse than getting your butt kicked.
                  Agree with you; but again you need to evaluate the situation. You will not have that same opinion if you have to visit your child in the hospital. TBH has tons of stories from internet tough guys. But reality is many times it does not work out this way.
                  Last edited by Captain39; 10-19-2018, 07:20 AM.

                  Comment


                    Update....

                    I met with the principle who is a good guy, we've generically talked a few times over the last couple of years.
                    He did some investigating and talked to several kids and a teacher that were there prior to meeting with them.
                    My son as well as the other kid were forthcoming and honest when asked what happened and the names that were called. Apparently this kid has been in trouble the last couple of years for name calling and running his mouth.
                    The principle talked with the them, made the kids talk to each other. They both have to come check in with him twice a week, as well as the teacher that has then in a class together. He said the policy is to suspend then both, but he wasn't going to do that. They have a pep rally today at school that they can't go to because they will be in a classroom together helping a teacher.
                    He said both of the boys seem to be Alpha kids and could be roll models for the 6th graders so they have to sit with and mentor them at lunch for a few weeks.

                    Our meeting went well, the kids hopefully resolved their issue as well. He was meeting with the other kids dad shortly after me.

                    Comment


                      Originally posted by Texas8point View Post
                      Update....

                      I met with the principle who is a good guy, we've generically talked a few times over the last couple of years.
                      He did some investigating and talked to several kids and a teacher that were there prior to meeting with them.
                      My son as well as the other kid were forthcoming and honest when asked what happened and the names that were called. Apparently this kid has been in trouble the last couple of years for name calling and running his mouth.
                      The principle talked with the them, made the kids talk to each other. They both have to come check in with him twice a week, as well as the teacher that has then in a class together. He said the policy is to suspend then both, but he wasn't going to do that. They have a pep rally today at school that they can't go to because they will be in a classroom together helping a teacher.
                      He said both of the boys seem to be Alpha kids and could be roll models for the 6th graders so they have to sit with and mentor them at lunch for a few weeks.

                      Our meeting went well, the kids hopefully resolved their issue as well. He was meeting with the other kids dad shortly after me.

                      Great!

                      Comment


                        Just in case, maybe your son should carry around a roll of nickles (lunch money)... never know when he might need a little extra money... If he's a rightie, he should practice with his left hand... I'm jus' sayin'... But keep that roll of nickles in the pants pocket on the strong side...

                        Comment


                          Originally posted by Texas8point View Post
                          Update....

                          I met with the principle who is a good guy, we've generically talked a few times over the last couple of years.
                          He did some investigating and talked to several kids and a teacher that were there prior to meeting with them.
                          My son as well as the other kid were forthcoming and honest when asked what happened and the names that were called. Apparently this kid has been in trouble the last couple of years for name calling and running his mouth.
                          The principle talked with the them, made the kids talk to each other. They both have to come check in with him twice a week, as well as the teacher that has then in a class together. He said the policy is to suspend then both, but he wasn't going to do that. They have a pep rally today at school that they can't go to because they will be in a classroom together helping a teacher.
                          He said both of the boys seem to be Alpha kids and could be roll models for the 6th graders so they have to sit with and mentor them at lunch for a few weeks.

                          Our meeting went well, the kids hopefully resolved their issue as well. He was meeting with the other kids dad shortly after me.
                          Now that is a quality educator right there. Using it as a teaching moment instead of just punishing them and letting them get days out of school.

                          Comment


                            There was mention of 6’ 200# 3rd graders earlier in this thread. I want to see them!


                            Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

                            Comment


                              Originally posted by MBV77 View Post
                              There was mention of 6’ 200# 3rd graders earlier in this thread. I want to see them!


                              Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
                              We had a 4th grader on our team last year that weighed in at 204, not sure what he weighed this year since he's on a different team.

                              Comment


                                Last year in 4th grade, he hasn't been held back either. Probably close to 6ft tall.



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