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Old 12-10-2014, 10:27 PM   #351
manwitaplan
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A rhinoceros horn is made of compacted hair.
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Old 12-10-2014, 10:33 PM   #352
Duzy
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A lustrum is 5 years.
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Old 12-10-2014, 10:49 PM   #353
switchbackxt
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TCR² View Post
Most elephants weigh less than the tongue of the blue whale.
A whale penis is called a dork.
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Old 12-10-2014, 11:09 PM   #354
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bowhunterchris View Post
Green poop is not necessarily a sign something is wrong with you...
Means you ate a rainbow snow cone
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Old 12-10-2014, 11:15 PM   #355
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If you fart while sitting next to your 4 gas meter it will go off.
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Old 03-18-2018, 10:21 PM   #356
Briar Friar
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Quote:
Originally Posted by switchbackxt View Post
A whale penis is called a dork.
(Dangit. Beat me to it...a couple of years ago.)

If a frog had wings...it wouldnt bump its *** when it hopped.

Donald Trump is President and Hillary Clinton is fugly.
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Old 03-18-2018, 11:15 PM   #357
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Only impregnated female mosquitoes suck blood. Beware of Preggos!
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Old 03-18-2018, 11:23 PM   #358
sticks
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TX_Hoghunter View Post
Did you know that in the 1500's the Muslims learned how to use the end of a goats intestines to prevent pregnancy?

And did you know that in the 1700's the British improved on the model by first removing it from the goat?

-john
Now that’s funny,,,,ritflmfao
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Old 03-19-2018, 04:23 AM   #359
Hart8
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The way it smells outside after it rains is called Petrichor.

Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk
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Old 03-19-2018, 09:44 AM   #360
Tony Pic
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Mega fawns are known to inhabit the Hill Country.
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Old 03-19-2018, 10:20 AM   #361
systemnt
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The total weight of skin in an average adult human is 6 lb.
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Old 03-19-2018, 11:31 AM   #362
Snowflake Killa
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BadRoad View Post
The first sexual innuendo on tv was in the 1950's......

"Gosh Ward, weren't you a little hard on the beaver last night?"
That's funny
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Old 03-19-2018, 11:48 AM   #363
silentstalker92
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how does one find a tread from 3 years ago?
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Old 03-19-2018, 11:52 AM   #364
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A NASCAR driver has to be at least 26yrs old before they can have a beer sponsor.
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Old 03-19-2018, 11:56 AM   #365
bullhead44
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Whaling is illegal in Oklahoma
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Old 03-19-2018, 12:07 PM   #366
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Originally Posted by bullhead44 View Post
Whaling is illegal in Oklahoma
Dey must not enforce it
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Old 03-19-2018, 05:37 PM   #367
CabezaBlanca
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Horses have bigger teeth than you think!
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Old 03-19-2018, 06:23 PM   #368
Chew
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Quote:
Originally Posted by silentstalker92 View Post
how does one find a tread from 3 years ago?
Look on your old rims in the garage. Find the old rims, you find the old tread.
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Old 03-19-2018, 06:30 PM   #369
lovetohunt
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Wombat poo is cubic
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Old 03-19-2018, 06:34 PM   #370
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Anything can be a dildo if your brave enough
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Old 03-19-2018, 07:17 PM   #371
CabezaBlanca
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bowtech38 View Post
Anything can be a dildo if your brave enough
1st Cavalry...I would associate brave with that...
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Old 03-19-2018, 07:41 PM   #372
2Lazy2P
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bowtech38 View Post
Anything can be a dildo if your brave enough
I saw one of them things swallow up a 2 5/16 ball on a reciever hitch one time. Figured i better just walk on home and call it a day.
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Old 03-19-2018, 08:07 PM   #373
Snowflake Killa
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High Island is the third highest point from Alabama to the Yucatan Penn
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Old 03-19-2018, 08:08 PM   #374
Snowflake Killa
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CabezaBlanca View Post
Horses have bigger teeth than you think!
Lol
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Old 03-20-2018, 12:08 AM   #375
Draco
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The brain size on the average horse is about the size of a pecan.
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Old 03-20-2018, 01:32 AM   #376
bt2143
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deer really don't eat peagravel
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Old 03-20-2018, 02:25 AM   #377
Pedernal
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Easter bunny is a hoax
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Old 03-20-2018, 02:33 AM   #378
Chew
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The military nickname for the white phosphorous mortar round is "Willy Peter". The mixture of high explosive (HE) rounds and Willy Peter rounds in one fire mission is known as "Shake and Bake".
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Old 03-20-2018, 02:34 AM   #379
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The #1 graduate from 1st Marine Division mortar fire direction school (beating out numerous superior NCOs and Officers) is the author of this post.
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Old 03-20-2018, 02:37 AM   #380
Chew
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Only two Marines shot ten out of ten at 500 meters prone (open sights, M16A2) during the 1989 3rd Marine Division rifle matches in Okinawa on a particularly windy day. One of them is the author of this post.






Everybody likes to toot their own horn once in a while! =)
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Old 03-20-2018, 07:07 AM   #381
trophy8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BigThicketBoy View Post
If you fart while sitting next to your 4 gas meter it will go off.
If you fart into your 4 gas meter it can/will blow the LEL sensor. So I’ve heard
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Old 03-20-2018, 08:05 AM   #382
Gunnyart
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Some of y’all missed the instructions... supposed to be “interesting” too.
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Old 04-26-2018, 10:44 AM   #383
Speedgoat
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Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.
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Old 04-26-2018, 10:52 AM   #384
wloftis
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You can always tell which side of the car the gas tank is on by looking at the fuel gauge, and seeing an arrow indicating which side the tank is on.
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Old 04-26-2018, 10:58 AM   #385
savage1134
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Its impossible to lick your elbow? ok how many tried?
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Old 04-26-2018, 10:59 AM   #386
Neck
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Snakes fart. Some even build up their gas and expel it at once as a defense mechanism when attacked.
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Old 04-26-2018, 11:12 AM   #387
ultrastealth
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It is physically impossible to swallow your tongue.
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Old 04-26-2018, 11:18 AM   #388
Tony Pic
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We drive on parkways and park on driveways.
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Old 04-26-2018, 11:24 AM   #389
systemnt
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A road flare can be made into a make shift welding tool if needed...and sometimes even if its not needed......or particularly wanted....
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Old 04-26-2018, 11:30 AM   #390
Abcdj
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An airplanes shadow is the same size either sitting on the ground or at any height!
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Old 04-26-2018, 12:27 PM   #391
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If it don’t tequila ya it makes you stronger.
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Old 04-26-2018, 12:30 PM   #392
Pushbutton2
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Chuck Norris once slammed a revolving door
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Old 04-26-2018, 12:40 PM   #393
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pushbutton2 View Post
Chuck Norris once slammed a revolving door
Yeah, but Burnadell once slammed Chuck Norris.
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Old 04-26-2018, 12:51 PM   #394
jerp
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One inch of rain falling on one acre equals 27,154 gallons of water.
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Old 04-26-2018, 01:17 PM   #395
bulltx50
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There are no nude beaches in Arizona.
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Old 04-26-2018, 05:53 PM   #396
Pushbutton2
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To this very day HMS Titanics swimming pools are still filled with water.
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Old 04-26-2018, 06:27 PM   #397
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hogman7290 View Post
And Obama will fix everything
I think we have a winner!!!!
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Old 04-26-2018, 08:17 PM   #398
curtintex
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When locating underground utilities, paint is used to mark the location:

Water-Blue
Sewer-Green
Communications- Orange
Gas- Yellow
Irrigation- Purple
Electrical-Red


Of course none of this matters is the dumbass doing the marking is wrong about the location!
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