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Old 11-09-2019, 07:35 PM   #1
Bear Charge
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Told my wife he was teaching my 11 year old to be a man. Fortunately, I was at a soccer game with my youngest. Otherwise, we would have had a man "talk."
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Old 11-09-2019, 07:37 PM   #2
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? Not sure I get the deal here?
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Old 11-09-2019, 07:37 PM   #3
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Elaborate please...
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Old 11-09-2019, 07:39 PM   #4
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To clarify, the boy didn't play or have any interaction with the coach.
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Old 11-09-2019, 07:41 PM   #5
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If I’m understanding it right, a young coach told your wife that he is teaching your 11 year old son to be a man?
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Old 11-09-2019, 07:41 PM   #6
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I don’t know any details or the context but as a coach for the last 10 yrs I would not say that to any parent. Although many kids do need to be taught some life skills that will make them a better man. Some of my kids lacked a father figure. He probably doesn’t have the best coaching techniques.


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Old 11-09-2019, 07:44 PM   #7
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Is the coach not your sons coach, confused.


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Old 11-09-2019, 07:45 PM   #8
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Essentially, the team didn't play well. My boy is playing with older kids and doesn't expect to get much, if any playing time. I'm okay with that because it was his decision. He didn't play today as expected. That is why I question why the coach went to him and told him to "look in the mirror and ask if he gave all his effort." When my wife questioned that considering that the boy didn't play he said, "I'm teaching him to be a man."
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Old 11-09-2019, 07:46 PM   #9
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Was he addressing the entire team or single him out? Was it a game or practice?


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Old 11-09-2019, 08:00 PM   #10
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That’s just not right. Not his job no matter what he thinks. Soccer players can be men too. I met one once.
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Old 11-09-2019, 08:03 PM   #11
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My son now plays D1 basketball and I know the coaches value their demeanor as much on the bench as on the court. They have a role to play no matter where they are. Do you know that your kid wasn't whining or being negative about the game?
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Old 11-09-2019, 08:25 PM   #12
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Nope. Sitting under the coach the entire time. Again, this is not about playing time. My boy chose to play with older kids knowing that he wouldn't play much. I'm just concerned about the coach "teaching my son to be a man."
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Old 11-09-2019, 08:50 PM   #13
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You don't actually think you are the only male influence it will take to "teach your son to be a man" do you? I embrace what other people have done to help form my boys into the young men they now are. You should too.
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Old 11-09-2019, 09:40 PM   #14
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Have dealt with many coaches over the years. Most were top-notch, and many employed psychological approaches that were not immediately evident. (Son played four years of college baseball.) Give it a little time. If not happy with playing time or development, move him to another team or level. Playing is pretty crucial to development.
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Old 11-09-2019, 09:48 PM   #15
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Very unclear story.
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Old 11-09-2019, 09:49 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Willicd76 View Post
You don't actually think you are the only male influence it will take to "teach your son to be a man" do you? I embrace what other people have done to help form my boys into the young men they now are. You should too.
The key phrase here is “what other people have done to ‘help’ form boys into the men they now are”.

Sounds like the coach who is barely a man himself doesn’t have the best idea of how to do that quite yet. Would be a situation where I might ‘help’ home learn to be a man.
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Old 11-09-2019, 09:50 PM   #17
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Clear as mud
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Old 11-09-2019, 09:52 PM   #18
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Kids need to learn how to handle bad coaches/bosses too. Let it play out
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Old 11-09-2019, 09:55 PM   #19
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I think I would want my son to be playing all the time with players of his own age rather than playing up and not playing with older kids for what ever reason. That would not be his choice at 11. I would make that call for him. Playing beats sitting especially at a young age.
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Old 11-09-2019, 09:57 PM   #20
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Originally Posted by Willicd76 View Post
You don't actually think you are the only male influence it will take to "teach your son to be a man" do you? I embrace what other people have done to help form my boys into the young men they now are. You should too.
I'm an assistant Principal at a middle school. I know that I'm not the only one that will influence my children. I wouldn't do the job I do if I didn't believe that. I hope they do better than I have and that will require some outside influence.
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Old 11-09-2019, 09:58 PM   #21
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If you don’t like a coach or organization then I suggest move him. My kid played for different style organizations as he developed. Learned something from every coach he played for
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Old 11-09-2019, 10:27 PM   #22
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I think I would want my son to be playing all the time with players of his own age rather than playing up and not playing with older kids for what ever reason. That would not be his choice at 11. I would make that call for him. Playing beats sitting especially at a young age.
This right here. He can’t get any better watching the older boys from the bench. My 10 yr old plays on an 11u team. He leads off and starts in the field because he competes. If he didn’t compete he would play with kids his own age.
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Old 11-09-2019, 10:51 PM   #23
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Quote:
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I'm an assistant Principal at a middle school. I know that I'm not the only one that will influence my children. I wouldn't do the job I do if I didn't believe that. I hope they do better than I have and that will require some outside influence.
Poor reflection on public schools...no one can understand the situation you’re upset with due to horrible communication skills
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Old 11-09-2019, 11:14 PM   #24
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I don’t think a coach should say those things to an 11 year old. Is 11 or 12 year old soccer that competitive? I’m with you, I’d get a little peeved as well. It’s just a soccer game.

And it’s your job to “teach him to be a man” not some preteen soccer coach.
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Old 11-09-2019, 11:48 PM   #25
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Poor reflection on public schools...no one can understand the situation you’re upset with due to horrible communication skills
Amen!

Are you upset because he sat on the bench or only because of the coach’s choice of words? What prompted that? Did your wife ask the coach why he didn’t play? I see no problem with what he said. Good grief, you should have heard some of my coach’s choice of words!!!

Your explanation leaves a lot of room for confusion.
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Old 11-10-2019, 12:27 AM   #26
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I really couldn't follow to well on what the real problem was but what i did get out of it is some of you think a 25 yr old is just a kid. I was 17 1/2 when i joined the Army inf, and there have been countless young MEN and WOMEN who have died for this country who by you're standards were kids. That's complete BS imo.
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Old 11-10-2019, 02:26 AM   #27
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Poor reflection on public schools...no one can understand the situation you’re upset with due to horrible communication skills
I was thinking the exact same thing.
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Old 11-10-2019, 07:33 AM   #28
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sounds like a dumb *** 25 yr old
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Old 11-10-2019, 07:38 AM   #29
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Just read this again this morning and still don’t get what you are upset about.
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Old 11-10-2019, 07:42 AM   #30
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Another problem. Parents should not be allowed to listen to the coaching staff and there should not be any contact with the coaches for 24 hours if there is an issue. After 24 hours most folks have slept on it and emotions are not so high. Parents should protect their kids and watch them like a hawk for coaches that are predators. Other than that just do what is asked to help out and be there to support your child
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Old 11-10-2019, 07:44 AM   #31
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The blue berry scones from target are good

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Old 11-10-2019, 07:51 AM   #32
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Poor reflection on public schools...no one can understand the situation you’re upset with due to horrible communication skills
This! It's like a second-grader typed it up.
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Old 11-10-2019, 08:20 AM   #33
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The blue berry scones from target are good

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Why do you have to go here

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Old 11-10-2019, 08:39 AM   #34
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Hey, at least it wasn’t the soccer coach trying to teach your son to be a man.
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Old 11-10-2019, 09:08 AM   #35
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Why do you have to go here

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I apologize. What had happened wuz I hit the reply button and forgot what this thread was about. So cents I was trying to get a blue berry out of my grill it reminds me of the scones. So eye mentioning it hear

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Old 11-10-2019, 09:28 AM   #36
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I am so confused
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Old 11-10-2019, 09:35 AM   #37
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half the people in this thread don't even realize this was a baseball game and not a soccer game. Everyone's confused.
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Old 11-10-2019, 09:48 AM   #38
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Old 11-10-2019, 10:04 AM   #39
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Quote:
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I apologize. What had happened wuz I hit the reply button and forgot what this thread was about. So cents I was trying to get a blue berry out of my grill it reminds me of the scones. So eye mentioning it hear

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I sea what you mean

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Old 11-10-2019, 10:14 AM   #40
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Old 11-10-2019, 10:26 AM   #41
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When my boy was little playing basketball

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Old 11-10-2019, 11:59 AM   #42
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Lamp. I love lamp.


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Old 11-10-2019, 12:05 PM   #43
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This must be some East texas thing that some of us just don’t understand. What’s the coaches age have to do with it?
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Old 11-10-2019, 12:24 PM   #44
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Has he tried to eat jackrabbit?
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Old 11-10-2019, 12:35 PM   #45
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Old 11-10-2019, 12:38 PM   #46
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Not allowed to hurt feels anymore..so ill just say.. blueberry scones are for women.
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Old 11-10-2019, 12:40 PM   #47
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I'd let coach do his job... if he wants to compete with the older boys, his attitude needs to stay competitive. Why lead him in there "expecting" to play less. He should be giving his all, and ready to play if the team needed him. Unless your coach was just straight up rude, I think your making mountains out of a molehill.
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Old 11-10-2019, 12:55 PM   #48
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Did u see the size of that chicken
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Old 11-10-2019, 01:00 PM   #49
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Where do you find this crap

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Old 11-10-2019, 01:01 PM   #50
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Parents have always gotten mad at me for trying to make men out of their kids.....of course I've been coaching girls for the last 20 years, so maybe that's it.
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