How do you cope with the loss of a Father

[mjhaverkamp]

I did not read any of the responses because I did not want to cry. It was very tough for me as well, my Mother died 6 months after my Dad, they were inseparable for over 50 years. One thing I do is have a cup of coffee with them almost every morning, I have each of their favorite coffee mugs, I pour me a cup and tell them both how much I love and miss them, it will get better but you will think of him every day, sorry for your loss.

[rferg84]

I lost my father in August 2017 to a farming accident. I don't think there is a solution and I still have a hard time talking about it. The worst part is my oldest daughter. I fear, as does my wife, that his passing is affecting her and the way she reacts to situations. The question is how do I help her if I don't really know how to help myself. I try to exude strength, suppress the hurt, put one foot in front of the other and only remember the good times. While that works decent for me, it doesn't do anything to help my daughter. Good luck, we all go through it (I guess). You will find your way...

It took me going through a couple I didn’t mesh with but I found a counselor that helped me tremendously. There was so much I was bottling up to be strong that I shouldn’t have. Counseling changed my life after I lost my dad. It’s been s rough 15 months, lost my grandmother a year to the day after my dad.

Don’t ever be afraid to seek help from someone who’s trained. It was a totally different experience than I expected.

[Acameron52]

Sorry brotha. It’s something we all go through eventually but I hope to not find out for a long time. I love my dad more than anything. We haven’t always seen eye to eye and used to butt heads a lot but the older i get the closer we get, mainly because I realize after all these years that he wasn’t being hard on me to be an Ahole but rather because he wanted me to turn out to be a better man than him. We talk all the time and hunt and fish as much as possible and he’s always the first person I can when I can’t figure something out. He’s not the healthiest person and his family history doesn’t lend well to a long life so I’m cherishing every moment we have together these days.

[dagdog]

My dad died in 1997, six months before the birth of my son, his first grandchild. Dad died unexpectedly from a heart attack. Like most have said I think of him every day and am thankful for all that he taught me. Some of the sweetest memories are of our times together hunting and fishing. When I was in my early 20's I saved and bought him a Browning Over and Under 12 gauge. I drove home for Pheasant season and loaded that gun in his case instead of his old model 12. The look on his face was priceless when he slid it out of the case. He dusted the first rooster of the day with the first shot, something I will never forget.

I really didn't grieve his death. I lost myself in my new son and being a father. I missed my dad but kept it penned up. When my son went off to college two years ago it opened up an emotional tidal wave and all of the grief that I had kept bottled up over the years came out. Not just grief of his loss but the loss of my grandparents and friends. It was rough and I am just now getting back to an even keel. I didn't grieve because the pain of it scared me. Don't make my mistake. Grieving is healing. It is Gods way of cleaning out all of the sadness and pain of the loss, however big or small the loss may be. Grieving also keeps us connected to our emotions and our true selves. Before I grieved I was bitter, and easily got angry. Now that all of that is out of me I am much more sensitive to my wife and kids. Life is better.

The lie is that real men don't cry, don't need to feel the pain of anything much less the pain of loss. I've been around a lot of big men bawling their eyes out over grief and loss and they come out the other side better for it and are still big men. Crying for my father, grieving his loss, once I finally did it was one of the best things I have ever done. My memories of him are clearer and sweeter than they were before and my relationship with my family is better as well. I'm glad that you are seeking advice and help. Ask God to show you your way.

[RyHolub]

I’m going on 21 years old now and I lost my Dad at 13 years old. We hunted every season together from dove to deer. I’d be lying to you if I said it gets easier. But the best thing to hold onto are the memories of y’all hunting together down to every little detail. I tell those stories every time a hunting conversation is struck up and they allow you to remember some of the most cherished times in your life. I even find myself doing some of the same things my dad did which suddenly bring me joy. He wouldn’t want you to give up hunting just because he’s not with you physically. When I’m hunting hard, I find myself praying and my dad has brought me many big bucks. The best way to honor his memory is by taking part in the things he loved the most. Prayers for you and don’t ever hesitate to reach out to someone for help.


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