Just venting/child supprt

[Goldeneagle]

My son got a letter from the AG just the other day. His ex is wanting him to provide health insurance for a child that is not his. I don't know why the AG even entertained the idea. The kid has a different name. Ain't happening.

[justintyme8303]

I am by no means saying I don't want to help my ex with my son, but my CS just went up to over $1000 a month. I have a decent paying job, and don't Mind paying my fair share, but I truly feel that's a little ridiculous. Maybe not. Wouldn't be so bad but she does not work, and her and her new husband literally take 2-3 vacations a year. Maybe I'm wrong in being upset, but in the last 2 years alone they've been to Hawaii, NYC, a cruise in Mexico, Florida, and I'm fairly sure they drove to Nashville at some point as well. Any other dads have/had to deal with this?

Sounds like you have a great paying job and a good case of MTI. Her traveling the globe is really not your business and you knowing just makes you thinking thats where your money is going. You need to stop feeding that monster it will drive you nuts. Get out of the loop on her new life all you need to know is stuff about him nothing else. Not sure the age of your son but if old enough let him know too and you dont want to talk about mom unless its effecting him otherwise thats her business.

What were you paying b4? Is that the full 25% of your income?

Does that include you carrying him on your insurance too or paying her for carrying him on hers?

$1000 a month is only 250 a week and like 35.72 a day heck breakfast, lunch, and dinner will just about take care of that. And once he gets older and starts sports his food intake will double as will her grocery bill. lol

Dont forget the AG gets a % it think its like $25 per $500 they collect each month right off the top.

Ive paid my share and yes it sucked but was cheaper than keeping her and less stressful than the relationship.

[randal]

My wife got pregnant when she was 18, and we have 1 together, 1 on the way. I have been in the picture since he was 4. the father pays $400/month (which they agreed on without court). Her and I made a deal that it all goes into savings that the kid will get, not when he is "18" but when he is old enough to be smart with money. I don't understand these people that pay $1,000/month, i don't spend an extra $1,000 each month because he lives with us and if we depended on child support I would need to have another job.. we have never done it but I don't like the idea of the 50-50 time between houses. I think it would be too hard on a kid. I know I'd go crazy if I was living at two different houses, but at the same time I'd go crazy only seeing my kids 4 days a month.. it can be really hard on kids having split parents and I've seen it first hand. We have always gotten along but it can get tricky at times. Especially when your wife thinks one way and I have to agree with her ex on the situation!

[Brinkley]

The numbers arent divisble by 3. She was going to have rent, vehicle, insurance regardless. Yes, some expenses are higher ( costs more for a house large enough for 3 vs 1, etc ) and should be accounted for, but the base cost should be taken out of the equation first. Also, since yall have come to an agreement, anything agreed to is fair. We are talking about a judgement rendered by the courts and forced upon the father.

Fair point. I do believe the courts mess things up when they get involved. I feel it is best for everyone if you can come to your own agreements. I can, and have heard of cases where it seems the fathers have gotten worked over in these situations.

[ThePumaLives]

Yep, I'm in the same boat. 1300 a month plus I have to provide insurance for medical, dental, and vision. Whatever isn't covered by insurance we split 50/50; but she has my son on Medicaid (even though he has insurance through me) so they "pay" her half; and I say "pay" because they refuse to pay anything since he is covered on my insurance and I just get a bill through the state. I was also responsible for paying half of his daycare; you know, the daycare that was her grand mother's house and she charged 1200 a month and only watched him. The judge in TX stopped that nonsense. She also collects food stamps in both TX and LA, as well as housing assistance (her and her current boyfriend bounce between relatives' houses), and my son is on free lunches.

What does she do for a living? She's a student. A student that isn't enrolled in school and never has been. She lives off the child support and government assistance and whatever family she can sponge off until they get tired of her. My son is in kindergarten and is currently moving and will now be attending his fourth public school; two for pre-K and two for kindergarten.

For those wishing there was an itemized account of how child support is spent, there is and the state can provide it to you. It won't help though. The account showed everything she spent was at eating places, bars, nail salons, and clothing stores. She was also paying credit card bills with it. The judge didn't want to hear it, for all he knows she spent her own money on providing for my son and is then reimbursing herself. Want a real kick in the nuts? Every 60 days I have to go to court and defend myself against accusations of kidnapping (my wife posted something Pinterest about Disney world), being a government hating madman (my wife bought me a pistol for Christmas), being a terrorist (I worked overseas previously in the Middle East), being a racist (I worked for the Trump campaign), endangering my son (we bought a new car for my wife, it's a sports car), I'm dangerous because I'm deranged from "The PTSD (I served in the military), and interfering in his health and education (I signed up to receive an account for all of his school stuff like attendance and progress reports).

Like others have said though; me and my wife put our all into raising him the best we can with our limited time. He definitely sees the difference between the two households. It breaks your heart though when a five year old tells you that he likes your house because he gets to sleep in the same house every night.

[asttbe]

I paid $1856 a month in child support for 2 kids. $1000 every two weeks on payday for spousal support. The mortgage on the house she lived in (lost the house in the divorce). Her and the kids vehicle payments and insurance. And 100% of medical, dental, and vision insurance on the kids.

I was soooooooo happy to see my kids graduate High School for many reasons

[kcmarullo]

I feel your pain I paid 1500 a month plus insurance for 7 years not fun

[Traildust]

You can hire a Mexican hit man for around $1500.......so I hear......

[flywise]

My son got a letter from the AG just the other day. His ex is wanting him to provide health insurance for a child that is not his. I don't know why the AG even entertained the idea. The kid has a different name. Ain't happening.

google that...it very well might happen
Several stories where non bio parent is paying for kids

[JLivi1224]

Your CS cannot be raised unless she filed the review paperwork which I believe is sent out every 3 years. However, a $1,000 increase is crazy. Review must show material and substantial change which of course is relative. At the state standard of 20%, it would take an awful lot make a $1,000 jump!

[MySRT8U]

The average cost of raising a child to 18 is $245,340. That comes out to $13,630 per year, or $1,135.83 per month. At $1,000 per month you are paying 88% of the expenses for that child. Going by the national average that is.

[jer_james]

The average cost of raising a child to 18 is $245,340. That comes out to $13,630 per year, or $1,135.83 per month. At $1,000 per month you are paying 88% of the expenses for that child. Going by the national average that is.

That number is ridiculous. I have my kid 40% of the time. So deduct that time that I have him, and am providing as well.

And I'm a lucky one - I pick them up Tues from school and take them the next day. Pick them up Friday and Take them Monday to school.

She's not paying for those meals or anything that goes on at my house.

[JLivi1224]

The average cost of raising a child to 18 is $245,340. That comes out to $13,630 per year, or $1,135.83 per month. At $1,000 per month you are paying 88% of the expenses for that child. Going by the national average that is.

And dependent on custody, this child is with him at most 50% of the time if he's lucky. Unless of course an agreement has been reached between the parents staying otherwise.

[JLivi1224]

That number is ridiculous. I have my kid 40% of the time. So deduct that time that I have him, and am providing as well.

And I'm a lucky one - I pick them up Tues from school and take them the next day. Pick them up Friday and Take them Monday to school.

She's not paying for those meals or anything that goes on at my house.

Bingo.

[Codyw48]

My wife and I were divorced for a few years. When we got remarried I had to stop the child support for coming out of my checks. AG found out I had over paid by a few thousand dollars and they made me sign a statement that said I wouldn't sue. Also, the state was the one taking the child support money out of my checks.