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Some of you will get these; some won’t.

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    Some of you will get these; some won’t.

    A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

    A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

    An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

    Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

    A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

    Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

    A question mark walks into a bar?

    A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

    Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

    A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

    A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

    Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

    A synonym strolls into a tavern.

    At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

    A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

    Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

    A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

    An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

    The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

    A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

    The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

    A dyslexic walks into a bra.

    A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

    An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television getting drunk and smoking cigars.

    A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

    A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

    A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.

    *(I can’t take credit for these, but the malapropism is my favorite. Enjoy!)

    #2
    I liked you better when you beat peoples asses for posting stuff like this...

    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by systemnt View Post
      I liked you better when you beat peoples asses for posting stuff like this...
      I guess I’m getting mellow in my advancing age.

      Comment


        #4
        Someone call the home. He done got out again.

















        Comment


          #5
          He said dangling participle

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by Uncle Saggy View Post
            He said dangling participle
            You know you've got a problem when your participle is danglin.

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by Goldeneagle View Post
              You know you've got a problem when your participle is danglin.


              That’s what I’m talking about

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by Goldeneagle View Post
                You know you've got a problem when your participle is danglin.


                And Randy fishes with someone who has that problem












                Hi Randy

                Comment


                  #9
                  Hi back at ya!

                  Comment


                    #10
                    A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, why the .... Crap just forget it.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      WOW!!! just WOW!!!

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by Uncle Saggy View Post
                        He said dangling participle
                        Yep and that is when I stopped reading.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Me walked into a bar to get away from this...


                          Comment


                            #14
                            “A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned a man with a glass eye named Ralph.“

                            You guys don’t know funny!

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Jerry thinks Burnadell is off his meds

                              Comment

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