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Old 10-17-2018, 10:34 PM   #51
Texas8point
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Default School situation with my 12 yr old

Itís all good

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Old 10-17-2018, 10:38 PM   #52
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Thats what happens when you take away a kids ability to defend themselves and put it into the hands of the school. The school cannot and will not be able to handle all the issues. And when it isnt handled and kids arent able to stand up for themselves it eats them up inside. Day after day till they snap and kill themselves or someone else. Why we take away their fundamental right to defend themselves is beyond my comprehension
I agree. It's just plain stupid that a kid could get in trouble with the law for defending their self. What does that say about us as a society? They're trying to teach these kids to become a target. I'm not saying violence is the answer......ok....scratch that. Yes it is.

Some people just need pain inflicted on them in a bad way to get the point across. That's the way it always has been and always will be. A bully feeds off of fear,whether it's the victims fear of them or the victims fear of getting into trouble if they defend their self. Once they sense that fear it won't stop until the victim stands up and tries his hardest to break every bone in their face right there in front of God and everyone else.

The best thing he can do is ignore any malicious comment or anything of that sort through text or social media. Which means all threats should be said man to man. And follow through with them.

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Old 10-17-2018, 10:47 PM   #53
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A kid at 12 years old has to be taught to stand up for himself. Do not instigate and do not bully but if your picked on or backed into a corner you come out fighting. I will not teach my kids to lay down and be cowards. What are they gonna do later in life when they graduate and have to defend themselves or there family? People will try to run you over your entire life if you let them.
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Old 10-17-2018, 10:47 PM   #54
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What a crappy time we are in. Having to worry what might happen to our child for defending themselves.
I may be totally wrong, but I agree with hoghunter69. Have a meeting with both kids and parents and let them know you are going to give the green light to your kid to take care of business if he continues to be bullied.
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Old 10-17-2018, 10:58 PM   #55
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Man, this stuff goes on in Elementary, Junior High, and even High School. It is unreal. Sometimes the bullies have no idea who they are messing with. OP.....not sure if the bully is in several of your son’s classes.....my two cents at the end of my drama.... When my son ( Athlete ) was a Junior in High School, two dopeheads decided to engage him one day in the class and in the hall before a Teacher stopped an incident. However, the Teacher reported it. Unbelievably my son was pulled from the baseball field later in the afternoon by the Principal. He was made to be felt like he was a bad guy. That afternoon my son told my wife and I what happened. I asked him if he could take them. He said he could pummel both of them at the same time. That was Friday evening. On Monday morning at 7am we were in the Principals office. The Pricipal agreed that the two thugs were the instigators and had talked to them as well. I demanded that a Monitor be placed in that particular class for the entire week. This was not for my sons safety. It was for the safety of the other two kids. My suggestion.....a Monitor needs to be in that class based on your demand. Otherwise things can escalate. I know they cannot do this in all cases. However, they did at my request and every day for one week my son told me there was a male adult in that class watching them. Again, I realize there are not a bunch of extra folks to go around but if it gets serious then the school has to do something. Hope things get better for your son.
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Old 10-17-2018, 11:15 PM   #56
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My gosh what the hell is going on in our society that two kids can’t duke it out anymore!
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Old 10-17-2018, 11:16 PM   #57
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Been there done that. We told ours to throat punch the bully.

The name calling quit when my wife and i told the principal our son was gonna take matters into his own hands since the attempts to do it correctly were not answered.



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Been a year or so, actually a long time ago, when this zero tolerance crap came out and anybody involved got an assault ticket. We got called to the Jr High a d I lwt the assistant principal go bbn on for a bit on how my son was going to be suspended, sent to alternative school and get an assault ticket. Wife was discussing and finally I couldnt take his crap no more, stopped him and asked the kid what happened. He said same old crap with same kid, bullying and hit him in back of football helmet with another helmet, swinging it like a bat. Son said it about knockednhim out but he didnt do anything until locker room when bully apprached him and slapped him. Son wasnt taking it anymore, crumpled the kid up and was stuffing him in a locker when coach came around the corner.

I said okay, looked at principal and said it sounded like self defense. Long story short, he called school resource officer, she walked in and said, hey sergeant, what are you doing here. Principal about unloaded a brick when he found out I was LEO, but still told her to do an assault. She asked what happened, was told and she said nope, self defense.

Later, that principal started calling my son sir when my son got elected to the school board.

Bullies suck...

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Old 10-17-2018, 11:18 PM   #58
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Been a year or so, actually a long time ago, when this zero tolerance crap came out and anybody involved got an assault ticket. We got called to the Jr High a d I lwt the assistant principal go bbn on for a bit on how my son was going to be suspended, sent to alternative school and get an assault ticket. Wife was discussing and finally I couldnt take his crap no more, stopped him and asked the kid what happened. He said same old crap with same kid, bullying and hit him in back of football helmet with another helmet, swinging it like a bat. Son said it about knockednhim out but he didnt do anything until locker room when bully apprached him and slapped him. Son wasnt taking it anymore, crumpled the kid up and was stuffing him in a locker when coach came around the corner.

I said okay, looked at principal and said it sounded like self defense. Long story short, he called school resource officer, she walked in and said, hey sergeant, what are you doing here. Principal about unloaded a brick when he found out I was LEO, but still told her to do an assault. She asked what happened, was told and she said nope, self defense.

Later, that principal started calling my son sir when my son got elected to the school board.

Bullies suck...

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So does ur keyboard!
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Old 10-17-2018, 11:22 PM   #59
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Yall need to get Beto here to talk about why we all cant get along, bullies, nice kids, bad kids, Texas kids. Geez.....

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Old 10-17-2018, 11:24 PM   #60
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So does ur keyboard!
Yeah, typing on phone keyboard and it does.

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Old 10-18-2018, 02:19 AM   #61
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Never turn both cheeks. If your son has asked the bully to stop or you have already talked to the school with no avail. Time for some mma lessons
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Old 10-18-2018, 02:23 AM   #62
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Also if i EVER found out my kids were bullying someone the *** whooping they would recieve would be heard around the world
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Old 10-18-2018, 08:02 AM   #63
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Went this last year with my 4th grader, only he connected. We went on offense. We explained it had been going on for a long time and described all the strategies weíd given our son to help him work through it. We told the school that if they had a bullying investigation policy we wanted it started and that our son would continue to punch the kid in the face on a daily basis if need be until the other kid left him alone. That didnít get us very far with the school but one more good shot to the face the next week and the kid left my son alone.

I was also bullied in high school by a much bigger football player that I could not contend with physically. I hit him in the mouth in self defense and he beat the hell out of me. The next day he started up again and hit me in the back. I resorted to escalated violence that would have gotten me expelled these days, but that fool never messed with me ever again.
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Old 10-18-2018, 08:18 AM   #64
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I have to agree with the stand up for your self crowed. I have daughters but even with that always told them if your getting picked on they get 3 chances you tell the teacher or another adult about it if that does not get the job done do what you have to do. I even went as far as telling the teachers don't call me saying they beat the crap out of someone after telling you 3 times that it was happening, but if they swing 1st and never said anything that is another story. I say you have to tell them to go ahead and stand up for themselves if telling someone does nothing swing away and take the punishment.

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Old 10-18-2018, 08:20 AM   #65
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You have 3rd graders that are 6í?


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Not 3rd graders, but 5th graders, I have 2 in my unit and there are a few more in Gen Ed.

And yes everything in the Gen Ed of almost any school in TX is or shortly will be screwed up. You can sign papers to have corporal punishment given by the principal but no one else. It is getting to the point that you can hardly touch a kid to discipline him.

There is basically no way to discipline a student today and these kids know it. We have elementary kids attacking teachers and other students and not just in this district.

And do not tell me that this does not happen in the smaller rural schools. I work in a behavior unit in a large district and we gets kids constantly from our outlying rural districts because they cannot handle the behaviors of these kids. DO not believe what these kids are capable of, come spend a few days in my unit and see what they are capable of and then see if you could do this day in and day out. It is not easy.

I have been kicked, punched, bitten, scratched, had chairs, desks, books, binders and anything they can pick up thrown at me, stabbed with pencils, bitten, clothes torn and peed on. All in a days work. I also had on TA that was physically assaulted and he ended up tearing some ligaments in his wrist defending himself and this from a 3rd grader all trying to protect other kids in the room.

We are legally able to restrain a kid, but these kids know what they can do to stop us and it is a very strict set of rues that have to be followed before we an restrain them.

Times have changed and it is not getting any better for the good students and a lot of your kids and unfortunately there are not enough people that can change things and some of these changes for the worse are coming from people that have no idea what is happening in our school systems and some that do not really care.
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Old 10-18-2018, 08:28 AM   #66
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Diamond Dave’s ninja school should do the trick!

In all seriousness I hope the problem is resolved
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Old 10-18-2018, 08:33 AM   #67
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If a kid is calling your kid names - and then your kid punches them, then your kid is part of the problem. You can't just hit someone for saying bad stuff as a kid, or an adult. Bullying or not.

I agree it's horrible, but it is how it is. Self control is something kids should adhere to, so that they can practice the same when they are adults.

If he is threatening your kid, that is different.

Also, 95% of your kids aren't going to stomp a mud hole in anything more than likely. John Wayne and Westerns have some people believing in a false reality.
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Old 10-18-2018, 08:45 AM   #68
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If a kid is calling your kid names - and then your kid punches them, then your kid is part of the problem. You can't just hit someone for saying bad stuff as a kid, or an adult. Bullying or not.

I agree it's horrible, but it is how it is. Self control is something kids should adhere to, so that they can practice the same when they are adults.

If he is threatening your kid, that is different.

Also, 95% of your kids aren't going to stomp a mud hole in anything more than likely. John Wayne and Westerns have some people believing in a false reality.
I have told my son from the time he was little that fighting is not something he should do until it is a last resort. I also told him he is not to be anyone's doormat. This has been going on for a couple of months and I hoped it would resolve itself and it hasn't. I don't think my son standing up for himself makes him part of the problem. The school is involved now and will have the opportunity to make things right. I am skeptical, but will remain hopeful. At no time during this process will I ask my son to be this kids whipping boy. It will eventually get resolved and we will deal with the consequences, if there are any at that time.
As an adult you wouldn't tolerate someone treating you like that, so I will not ask my son to suffer through it. Adults also realize running your mouth could get you hurt or killed and that is why most of us don't do it.
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Old 10-18-2018, 08:47 AM   #69
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I hope it's all good today.

I have read some posts that make me question a few things and make me shake my head on this thread.

Several posts defending a DA, I will tell you this, they are politicians. They will indict a ham sandwich for the right political contribution, I have seen it happen. It's all who you know these days and that gets things done.

We have a local school that touts their "No Bullying Policy, Zero Tolerance" and it's the worst in the area for the issue. My best friend son gets bullied very often and has taken matters into his own hands 3 times just this year and was commended on his actions each time. That's from the assistant principal, who has a personal relationship with his father. It's all who you know. You know the deal, "the other kid deserved it, wink wink." I forgot to mention that my best friend is the Assistant DA,,,,

We have another school that a 504 student(junior in HS) was being bullied terribly for a while by a let's say a "rich, white, athlete" and it was bad. My son even heard and saw instances of it and a few other players intervened once or twice to stop it. Finally the kid had enough and went off, I mean went off and beat his tail. The bully, well nothing happened to him. The other kid, he was suspended for a week and then 2 weeks of ISS isolation. For those 3 weeks, over half the students cars were painted in Free Him, as they knew the wrong kid was punished. Did I forget to mention that the bullies mom worked at the school,,,,,, It got so bad for the bully, they had to put him into private school.

It's all who you know I believe regarding the outcome. Shouldn't be that way but it is.
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Old 10-18-2018, 08:53 AM   #70
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I have told my son from the time he was little that fighting is not something he should do until it is a last resort. I also told him he is not to be anyone's doormat. This has been going on for a couple of months and I hoped it would resolve itself and it hasn't. I don't think my son standing up for himself makes him part of the problem. The school is involved now and will have the opportunity to make things right. I am skeptical, but will remain hopeful. At no time during this process will I ask my son to be this kids whipping boy. It will eventually get resolved and we will deal with the consequences, if there are any at that time.
As an adult you wouldn't tolerate someone treating you like that, so I will not ask my son to suffer through it. Adults also realize running your mouth could get you hurt or killed and that is why most of us don't do it.
I would change my definition of doormat if you think being called a name is being a doormat.

Words have no power, until you give it to them. You can only control yourself, and people are going to say terrible things, and be terrible people. You can't control them as a kid or an adult.

As an adult you also realize that if you hit someone for calling you a name, you will go to jail.

If my kid hit someone because he called him a name, my kid would be severely punished. He would take responsibility, and understand that there is never a time where name calling results in physical violence.

As I said, threats and hostility are different.
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Old 10-18-2018, 08:58 AM   #71
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Not 3rd graders, but 5th graders, I have 2 in my unit and there are a few more in Gen Ed.

And yes everything in the Gen Ed of almost any school in TX is or shortly will be screwed up. You can sign papers to have corporal punishment given by the principal but no one else. It is getting to the point that you can hardly touch a kid to discipline him.

There is basically no way to discipline a student today and these kids know it. We have elementary kids attacking teachers and other students and not just in this district.

And do not tell me that this does not happen in the smaller rural schools. I work in a behavior unit in a large district and we gets kids constantly from our outlying rural districts because they cannot handle the behaviors of these kids. DO not believe what these kids are capable of, come spend a few days in my unit and see what they are capable of and then see if you could do this day in and day out. It is not easy.

I have been kicked, punched, bitten, scratched, had chairs, desks, books, binders and anything they can pick up thrown at me, stabbed with pencils, bitten, clothes torn and peed on. All in a days work. I also had on TA that was physically assaulted and he ended up tearing some ligaments in his wrist defending himself and this from a 3rd grader all trying to protect other kids in the room.

We are legally able to restrain a kid, but these kids know what they can do to stop us and it is a very strict set of rues that have to be followed before we an restrain them.

Times have changed and it is not getting any better for the good students and a lot of your kids and unfortunately there are not enough people that can change things and some of these changes for the worse are coming from people that have no idea what is happening in our school systems and some that do not really care.
Total BS these days, teachers not being able to do anything. We were dispatched to one JrHS and when I walked into the office, two teachers were trying to stop the flow of blood from their noses, one teacher had a swollen eye and the assistant principal had a bloody lip. Quick assessement was a student out of control, but he had calmed down for the moment and was sitting in an office. I walked in to check on him, another officer arrived and I told the kid he would have to go with us. He immediately stood up, said he wasn't going anywhere and that he was going to kick my arse too.

This kid was in the 8th grade, but was 6'1" and about 180 pounds. He clenched his fists and came at me, only to receive a face full of pepper spray. He went down like a ton of rocks, literally started crying and saying he wanted his mommy. The teachers and principal were all upset with me, asking why I sprayed this kid. I told them I was not going to my get butt kicked by this kid, and nurse injuries like they had. Kid went to juvenile center, and saw him a month later and we talked. He said that he was sorry for the way he acted, had anger issues and the teachers always let him get away with stuff, so he did what he wanted to do. He said I was the first person to really stand up to him, and he now knew there were people that would stand up to him and he never wanted to feel pepper spray again. All was good with him the rest of the school year.

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Old 10-18-2018, 09:00 AM   #72
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Originally Posted by jer_james View Post
I would change my definition of doormat if you think being called a name is being a doormat.

Words have no power, until you give it to them. You can only control yourself, and people are going to say terrible things, and be terrible people. You can't control them as a kid or an adult.

As an adult you also realize that if you hit someone for calling you a name, you will go to jail.

If my kid hit someone because he called him a name, my kid would be severely punished. He would take responsibility, and understand that there is never a time where name calling results in physical violence.

As I said, threats and hostility are different.
I understand what you are saying and I do not agree with you, but that's ok.
We just think differently is all and again that's ok.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:12 AM   #73
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In the litigious pansy society we live in, he'll get in more trouble than it's worth. It sucks. The best thing you can do is support him. That doesn't mean hold his hand and tell him the world will be nice to him. Teach him that verbal BS is just that, and to ignore it as much as possible. The second it becomes physical, give no quarter. There's a difference between being a coward who is afraid to fight and a man who won't let some POS drag him down.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:22 AM   #74
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Just so happens I teach 7th grade in a urban district and at an alternative campus. I see dozens of kids every year who were bullied and took matters into their own hands. You and your kid need to document everything, what was said, when it was said, and most important is to make sure that he is informing an adult at school every time it happens. I see so many people on here advising to tell him to take the high road, brush it off, blah, blah, blah. Over 90% of the adults on here can't do that themselves but an adolescent who is raging with feelings of insecurity, hate, and even guilt is supposed to be doing this? Talk to him every night, tell him how awesome he is for battling with this every day and how much everyone loves him. Let him know it's a process to get it fixed and that it will stop. The school is ultimately responsible to keep their students safe and in a lot of cases it requires the documentation and most importantly the letting adults know. If your son justs goes off and swings at him without telling anyone about the issue then 100% your son will take the fall. The kids I see at my work who are bullied all have developed anger issues from dealing with this but almost all of them have no family support to help them. They are kids who have been let down by their parents and the school. From just you posting on here I know that's not the case with you. Tell your son to report it every time and you call the school every time as well. Hope this helps, hate seeing kids like this. It breaks my heart.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:25 AM   #75
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I will never tell my son, or daughter for that matter, the following. . .

I have always told my son to keep his cool, catch him in the bathroom and see what he’s made of.....

:-) Laugh.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:38 AM   #76
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Originally Posted by Texas8point View Post
I understand what you are saying and I do not agree with you, but that's ok.
We just think differently is all and again that's ok.
Yessir - Good luck to your Son!
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:43 AM   #77
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I'm not that old but I remember being able to scrap in the halls or the playground and half the time afterwards you would be buddies with whoever you just threw down with.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:44 AM   #78
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Originally Posted by FVR JR View Post
In the litigious pansy society we live in, he'll get in more trouble than it's worth. It sucks. The best thing you can do is support him. That doesn't mean hold his hand and tell him the world will be nice to him. Teach him that verbal BS is just that, and to ignore it as much as possible. The second it becomes physical, give no quarter. There's a difference between being a coward who is afraid to fight and a man who won't let some POS drag him down.


This. Life is full of ďverbal *******sĒ. He is gonna have to learn to deal with them now or life is gonna come at him real fast. My .02 Cant meet words with fists these days as others have stated.


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Old 10-18-2018, 09:46 AM   #79
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Man, this all just makes me sick.

My friend's son was a freshman and was being verbally bullied by a much larger kid. It escalated to the occasional shove and the parents went to the school to formally document it. The other kids parents were asked to come in too. He told the school that they better get a handle on it or his son was going to retaliate physically. They said he cannot do that, no matter what happens to him.

Well, a week later the kid shoved him pretty good in the hall and his son laid the dude out. Other students said the bully made the initial aggressive move.

Punishment was severe and the system made sure they were both treated equally. It was sickening... Suspension, going before some kind of committee a couple of times to get brow beaten, having to write a paper on why violence is always wrong, making the boys sit down and apologize to each other, etcetera. This dragged out for a couple of months.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:46 AM   #80
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Just so happens I teach 7th grade in a urban district and at an alternative campus. I see dozens of kids every year who were bullied and took matters into their own hands. You and your kid need to document everything, what was said, when it was said, and most important is to make sure that he is informing an adult at school every time it happens. I see so many people on here advising to tell him to take the high road, brush it off, blah, blah, blah. Over 90% of the adults on here can't do that themselves but an adolescent who is raging with feelings of insecurity, hate, and even guilt is supposed to be doing this? Talk to him every night, tell him how awesome he is for battling with this every day and how much everyone loves him. Let him know it's a process to get it fixed and that it will stop. The school is ultimately responsible to keep their students safe and in a lot of cases it requires the documentation and most importantly the letting adults know. If your son justs goes off and swings at him without telling anyone about the issue then 100% your son will take the fall. The kids I see at my work who are bullied all have developed anger issues from dealing with this but almost all of them have no family support to help them. They are kids who have been let down by their parents and the school. From just you posting on here I know that's not the case with you. Tell your son to report it every time and you call the school every time as well. Hope this helps, hate seeing kids like this. It breaks my heart.


Thanks for this. Iím not a perfect parent, I mess up plenty. Good news is everyone else does too. Sound advice.


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Old 10-18-2018, 09:49 AM   #81
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Thanks for this. Iím not a perfect parent, I mess up plenty. Good news is everyone else does too. Sound advice.


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Agree
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:50 AM   #82
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Correct me if i'm wrong, but aren't these kids surrounded by teachers all day, including lunch & recess?

Don't understand why they aren't taking measures to stop bullying before it happens & addressing it when it's occurring.

I understand high-school may be different, but in middle school & elementary you'd think the adults in the schools should be able to address this.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:53 AM   #83
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Correct me if i'm wrong, but aren't these kids surrounded by teachers all day, including lunch & recess?

Don't understand why they aren't taking measures to stop bullying before it happens & addressing it when it's occurring.

I understand high-school may be different, but in middle school & elementary you'd think the adults in the schools should be able to address this.
The situation with my son was on the field before football practice at 7:45 in the morning.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:57 AM   #84
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Not 3rd graders, but 5th graders, I have 2 in my unit and there are a few more in Gen Ed.

And yes everything in the Gen Ed of almost any school in TX is or shortly will be screwed up. You can sign papers to have corporal punishment given by the principal but no one else. It is getting to the point that you can hardly touch a kid to discipline him.

There is basically no way to discipline a student today and these kids know it. We have elementary kids attacking teachers and other students and not just in this district.

And do not tell me that this does not happen in the smaller rural schools. I work in a behavior unit in a large district and we gets kids constantly from our outlying rural districts because they cannot handle the behaviors of these kids. DO not believe what these kids are capable of, come spend a few days in my unit and see what they are capable of and then see if you could do this day in and day out. It is not easy.

I have been kicked, punched, bitten, scratched, had chairs, desks, books, binders and anything they can pick up thrown at me, stabbed with pencils, bitten, clothes torn and peed on. All in a days work. I also had on TA that was physically assaulted and he ended up tearing some ligaments in his wrist defending himself and this from a 3rd grader all trying to protect other kids in the room.

We are legally able to restrain a kid, but these kids know what they can do to stop us and it is a very strict set of rues that have to be followed before we an restrain them.

Times have changed and it is not getting any better for the good students and a lot of your kids and unfortunately there are not enough people that can change things and some of these changes for the worse are coming from people that have no idea what is happening in our school systems and some that do not really care.
Have to ask. Was he humping you until he peed

My wife teaches 1st grade in a very good school or area. There's always at least one kid disrupting the entire school. It's crazy. This year it's a 5th grader that goes nut 2-3 times every week. He runs down the halls screaming curse words for 10-30 minutes. All the other classes have to basically distract their classes so they can't hear the cuss words. Been going on all year.

Last year was the puncher/biter/kicker. My wife was the only one(well cant say) but they couldn't touch either of these kids even just to control them.
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Old 10-18-2018, 09:57 AM   #85
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Being a teacher in a behavior unit in an elementary I deal with this on a daily basis. I have kids in my unit that bully and a lot of my kids get bullied by Gen Ed kids because those Gen Ed kids know if they can set my kids off, then my kids usually get in trouble not from hitting another kid but having escalated behaviors and possibly destroying a room. Some of these Gen Ed kids think this is funny. Documentation from the one getting bullied and support from a teacher and admin is key also. Some admin and teachers blow this off and that just escalates the problem. If my kids in my unit bully someone in Gen Ed or one of my other students, they will pay somehow and if they are bullied by a Gen Ed student and tell me about it, I will personally deal with the other student. I have had many meetings with an entire class about what will happen if the bullying continues.

Document, document and document and if the teachers or admin are no help contact someone at the Central office of the school.

Unfortunately in today's wussie society, this is the way it has to be done.

Thing is give me a paddle and the right to use it and this bullying and behavior will stop. period!
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:00 AM   #86
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Have to ask. Was he humping you until he peed

My wife teaches 1st grade in a very good school or area. There's always at least one kid disrupting the entire school. It's crazy. This year it's a 5th grader that goes nut 2-3 times every week. He runs down the halls screaming curse words for 10-30 minutes. All the other classes have to basically distract their classes so they can't hear the cuss words. Been going on all year.

Last year was the puncher/biter/kicker. My wife was the only one(well cant say) but they couldn't touch either of these kids even just to control them.
Thankfully no. First grader that was standing about 7 or 8 feet away from me and when he whipped it out I thought no way he could hit me, but he peed and hit my shoes!
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:02 AM   #87
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Have to ask. Was he humping you until he peed

My wife teaches 1st grade in a very good school or area. There's always at least one kid disrupting the entire school. It's crazy. This year it's a 5th grader that goes nut 2-3 times every week. He runs down the halls screaming curse words for 10-30 minutes. All the other classes have to basically distract their classes so they can't hear the cuss words. Been going on all year.

Last year was the puncher/biter/kicker. My wife was the only one(well cant say) but they couldn't touch either of these kids even just to control them.
I am guessing the school she teaches in does not have any sort of a behavior unit?

When I talk about a behavior unit, all my kids are either diagnosed with an Emotional Disturbance or one of 13 OHI's. Other Health Impairment such as Fetal Alcohol, ADD, ADHD, etc.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:02 AM   #88
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Originally Posted by antonlsu View Post
Correct me if i'm wrong, but aren't these kids surrounded by teachers all day, including lunch & recess?

Don't understand why they aren't taking measures to stop bullying before it happens & addressing it when it's occurring.

I understand high-school may be different, but in middle school & elementary you'd think the adults in the schools should be able to address this.
You are not wrong.....however, you may have the hallway, the bathroom, and at recess they cannot watch everyone. Itís not something that will ever go away. I believe though it starts at an early age and only escalates once they get older and bigger. Not saying kids canít change though. Too many factors involved.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:08 AM   #89
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Lots of crappy advice and lots of good advice good luck!

I have been in education for 24 years 19 as an administrator 7 of those years were at a middle school. Pm me if you need some advice not saying I am the all knowing but I have seen lots and dealt with lots of these issues.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:08 AM   #90
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Teach your kids some comebacks. I've found that a sharp tongue and embarrassing the other kid will often end it, a lot of times that is more intimidating in a weird way.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:09 AM   #91
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Thankfully no. First grader that was standing about 7 or 8 feet away from me and when he whipped it out I thought no way he could hit me, but he peed and hit my shoes!
My wife found a huge puddle of urine in the corner last week. She texted me all day about how she was trying to figure out which kid did it. LOL 1st graders and someone had to see but no one would rat the kid out.

Quote:
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I am guessing the school she teaches in does not have any sort of a behavior unit?

When I talk about a behavior unit, all my kids are either diagnosed with an Emotional Disturbance or one of 13 OHI's. Other Health Impairment such as Fetal Alcohol, ADD, ADHD, etc.
Yes, they have a behavior unit. I think it's one classroom but it's always filled up so there's always 1-3 kids in my wife's class that should be in the special class but the school makes excuses until it's too late.

It really is crazy how many "special" kids there are now. A lot IMO are because parents don't raise their kids at all anymore.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:12 AM   #92
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Most of my kids come from broken homes, that is pretty much the norm with my SEBSS kids. And yes, it takes a while to get a kid in my unit. Way too much paperwork and observations!
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:17 AM   #93
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Most of my kids come from broken homes, that is pretty much the norm with my SEBSS kids. And yes, it takes a while to get a kid in my unit. Way too much paperwork and observations!
Well the whole dang school has been observing this one kid yelling and screaming curse words nearly every day this year. So sad they can't do anything. I feel sorry for the teacher as my wife had a kid like that in her class 4 years ago.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:23 AM   #94
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I have to ask all the John Wayne's in this thread that tell their kids to 'handle it'- what do you tell them to do next after they get the snot beat out of them when they try to 'defend' themselves and fight back?

"Problem solved" my arse.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:25 AM   #95
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Everyone always assumes the bully is some easily defeatable (not a word, apparently) wuss in these threads.

I had a buddy through church that was somewhat of a bully in high school. Not sure "bully" is the right word, just a guy that took what he wanted when he wanted it. A few guys confronted him in the parking lot after school one day trying to make a name for themselves. Little gangbanger wannabes. 2 of them with bats in the background, their leader walked up and got in his face.

He knocked the first one completely unconscious with 1 punch, picked the kid up and tossed his body at the other 2 who took off running. Over the next week, the 2 that ran learned very hard lessons as well.

It's really easy to say, "My kid isn't going to be picked on, I've told him to go whoop his behind and by gosh he's gonna!" but a lot of times it's nowhere near that simple.

I'd go the route of working with the principle and trying to figure out what's really going on before taking the approach of telling your son to follow him into the bathroom. See if you can determine the nature of the beef - it's very possible your kid has also done something to **** off the other kid.

Be smart about it. Keep your cool.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:31 AM   #96
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I have to ask all the John Wayne's in this thread that tell their kids to 'handle it'- what do you tell them to do next after they get the snot beat out of them when they try to 'defend' themselves and fight back?

"Problem solved" my arse.
Most bullies are looking for a kid that cowards down and runs. This is why they continue to bully the same kids. When a kid stands up for themselves, nornally the bully will move on. If a kid gets a butt whoopin for defending himself, its much better than being a coward and tucking his tail between his legs. I dont think it has anything to do with being a bunch of John Waynes either. Its called self respect and its starts at that age.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:32 AM   #97
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I have to ask all the John Wayne's in this thread that tell their kids to 'handle it'- what do you tell them to do next after they get the snot beat out of them when they try to 'defend' themselves and fight back?

"Problem solved" my arse.
Apparently this has never happened to any TBH kid. We are all masters of kung fu or something and can teach our kids kung fu.

Internet rambos but now it internet kid rambos
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:35 AM   #98
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The other kid is bullying your son and should be handled appropriately by the school. They have a bullying policy I'm sure.

After that, your son needs to catch that kid in an alley somewhere.
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Old 10-18-2018, 10:45 AM   #99
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Most bullies are looking for a kid that cowards down and runs. This is why they continue to bully the same kids. When a kid stands up for themselves, nornally the bully will move on. If a kid gets a butt whoopin for defending himself, its much better than being a coward and tucking his tail between his legs. I dont think it has anything to do with being a bunch of John Waynes either. Its called self respect and its starts at that age.
The problem is that most people, of any age, only have self-respect until they have to sacrifice something to keep it. I had a kid giving me hell in the 8th grade. He outweighed me by about 40# and was a tough kid. The first day I fought him he whipped my ***. The next day I showed up with a black eye and he got the better of me again. The third day, he lost some heart and leaked some blood and I never had a problem with him again. My friends thought I was crazy, my Dad gave good advice and my principal was tired of seeing us both. (We both got swats after days 1 & 2). I guess if he'd have beat my *** that third day in a row I'd have showed up on day 4 ready to take another one. At our 20th Reunion, I told him we should do it again for old times sake, but he bought me a beer instead.
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Old 10-18-2018, 11:15 AM   #100
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Apparently this has never happened to any TBH kid. We are all masters of kung fu or something and can teach our kids kung fu.

Internet rambos but now it internet kid rambos
Agreed!

So now we say if you don't 'defend yourself', you don't have any self respect...

Seriously though, I never had an issue with bullying growing up (no one in their right mind would attempt it, lol). However, my girlfriend's son (freshman in HS) just faced his first 'bully' yesterday and she is going out of her mind. It is a horrible, frustrating situation for any parent.

To the OP- I hope your situation gets resolved ASAP.

Last edited by Roy; 10-18-2018 at 11:28 AM.
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