How do you tell your wife no?

[tps7742]

Thought about having a discussion on the topic and making a joint decision? Telling your wife “because I said so” doesn’t work as well as it does on kids.

Just like in corporate leadership...”those who help plan the battle don’t battle the plan.”

Good idea!

[Pedernal]

She wants a bigger closet, yard and bathroom. I wouldn’t mind having a little bit more yard.


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These are actually reasonable desires. So shop for a home that has all that but is in the same price range as the home you have now. Obviously, that will probably involve moving to a different neighborhood... Best of luck to you folks

[JLivi1224]

Thought about having a discussion on the topic and making a joint decision? Telling your wife “because I said so” doesn’t work as well as it does on kids.

Just like in corporate leadership...”those who help plan the battle don’t battle the plan.”

This. Big financial decisions need to be made together. My humble $.02.
On a side note I enjoy seeing you guys tell us how you hike up your britches, put your foot down and say “No woman! Now make me a sandwich!” I imagine these types of conversations rarely go down like this !

[OleTomTalker]

Thought about having a discussion on the topic and making a joint decision? Telling your wife “because I said so” doesn’t work as well as it does on kids.

Just like in corporate leadership...”those who help plan the battle don’t battle the plan.”

If y'all decide on a house you both want, who knows? Might end up with one somewhere that it could have a feeder and bowstand in the back yard.

[Part Timer]

She wants a bigger closet, yard and bathroom. I wouldn’t mind having a little bit more yard.


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Have you thought about maybe saying yes? Just cause its double your current house note doesn't make it unattainable. Heck my first house note was $700/month. lol

I make the money, i win the races, but we make decisions together to make us both happy. Maybe you dont want the bigger house payment because you know it will cut into "your" hunting fishing funds. Give and take.

If you think it might put yall into a financial bind i say tell her that and make your case clear. Most all divorces are do to financial struggles. Stress that to her. A big closet wont sooth the wounds of constant money fights.

I say pray on it like stated above. (and good luck cause they always win LOL)

[JHT]

She wants a bigger closet, yard and bathroom. I wouldn’t mind having a little bit more yard.


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Any way you can add on & remodel to your current house?

The need for the bigger yard for the dogs or just more space?

[bullhead44]

Glad my wife is the opposite. Our house was paid off 5 years ago. We will most likely never have a house payment again. Talk to her, and find out why she wants to move. If its gonna double what you pay on a mortgage, I would have to say no way. But I dont really need anything fancy to live in.

[Radar]

How do I tell my wife no? Get in my truck, drive to the next town over and send it in a text.

Lol

[stickemhard3]

I am open and up front about our 5 and 10yr plans. If we want to add something not already listed, we either need a bump in pay during that particular time frame or subtract some of the items listed. Finances are easy bc numbers don't lie. The problem is people lie to themselves about the numbers.

List out your 5yr and 10yr plan and have her do the same. Independent of each other and without discussing with each other. Negotiate the differences. List vacations, vehicles, investments, house, childrens college, etc. Build this from your current salaries with projected savings minus bonuses/ot. That should be a good start.

[AgHntr10]

She wants a bigger closet, yard and bathroom. I wouldn’t mind having a little bit more yard.


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Is there not any alternative areas you can build to get those things without doubling your mortgage?

[breederbuck33]

My wife was doing the same thing to me. We were in need of a house but we were not on the same page on what we wanted at all. Then one day she sends me a link on the "Make me move" section. The house wasn't ideal for me, but the price was much lower than the surrounding houses. I told her to pursue that one if she liked it. We ended up buying the house for much less that it was worth. We were able to do a 15 year mortgage and keep the note where we wanted it. if you look the house up on realtor today it shows its estimated value 55K over what we paid. That being said, she may end up finding you the perfect place if she is persistent enough! She wanted a neighborhood home like a sardine can neighborhood and that's what she got. I wanted 1-3 acres with chickens and goats. Now that we are in a neighborhood she wants chickens and goats too, so we are going to save up some more money, sell our house and build on some property in a few years!

[WItoTX]

It's easy for my wife and I. Either time one of us wants something that affects our "Company funds" (Yes, we each have our own personal account, and a joint account for "our" stuff), we sit down, look at our budget, and see what we can adjust to afford it. We never add money to our joint bucket. Then we save for months to make it happen. If we can't figure out how to make it happen, it doesn't happen.

My suggestion, sit down with your budget together, and work through how you can afford a new house. You never know, it might be possible if you cut back in one or two area's and make it happen.

This is how I got my new Traeger on the list of things to purchase.

[Acameron52]

Sounds like y’all will compromise and buy a new house...

[BrianL]

I look at housing and other real estates different than most any other purchase. They should be an investment if a 20-year note or fewer payments are in your budget. If at retirement you don't want a mortgage, sell and downsize.

[hooligan]

Is there not a middle ground that you would both be happy with like a new(er) house that isn't 2x as expensive? I agree with everyone that said its a discussion that needs to be had. I guess my wife and I are really open and direct when it comes to large purchases but she makes close to the same money I do and our checks go into a joint account. We're married and not dating, not planning on getting divorced so there is not need to keep money separate.

Good luck

We're been in this house for 3 years and are already starting to look for a different one because we had a kid and the schools here are **** but the North Texas market is stupid high right now